Funny Football Quotes – From Newcastle’s Kevin Keegan

We used to have a series called Funny Football Quotes and then Funny Football Quotes and Beautiful Woman and our former bosses Kevin Keegan and Bobby were featured the most. That was for their funny quotes of course. 😀


Here’s some quotes from Kevin Keegan from the past – but just think we have so many more to look forward to now.     😀

“There are two schools of thought on the way the rest of this half is going to develop; everybody’s got their own opinion.”

“Goalkeepers aren’t born today until they’re in their late twenties or thirties.”

“The game has gone rather scrappy as both sides realise they could win this match or lose it.”

“They compare Steve McManaman to Steve Heighway and he’s nothing like him, but I can see why – it’s because he’s a bit different.”

“You can’t do better than go away from home and get a draw.”

“He’s using his strength. And that is his strength, his strength.”

“Gary always weighed up his options, especially when he had none.”

“I’m not disappointed – just disappointed.”

“The tide is very much in our court now.”

“Chile have three options – they could win or they could lose.”

“I came to Nantes two years ago and it’s much the same today, except that it’s totally different.”

“A tremendous strike which hit the defender full on the arm – and it nearly came off.”

“The good news for Nigeria is that they’re two-nil down very early in the game.”

“The substitute is about to come on – he’s a player who was left out of the starting line-up today.”

“The 33 or 34-year-olds will be 36 or 37 by the time the next World Cup comes around, if they’re not careful.”

“England have the best fans in the world and Scotland’s fans are second-to-none.”

“Argentina won’t be at Europe 2000 because they’re from South America.”

“They’re the second best team in the world, and there’s no higher praise than that.”

“Luis Figo is totally different to David Beckham, and vice versa.”

“I want more from David Beckham. I want him to improve on perfection.”

“There’s a slight doubt about only one player, and that’s Tony Adams, who definitely won’t be playing tomorrow.”

“The Germans only have one player under 22, and he’s 23.”

“We are three games without defeat is another way of looking at it. But if we are honest we have taken two points from nine.”

“He’ll also be very dangerous from set-pieces. That means he’ll be a threat from free-kicks and corners in the final third of the field.”

“I’ll never play at Wembley again, unless I play at Wembley again.”

“You need 88 points for the title and we’ve got 61 at present with 16 games to go, but if you set targets you limit yourself.”

“We deserved to win this game after hammering them 0-0 in the first half.”

“Well, if that’s true then it would be a big suprise, but then nothing surprises me in football these days.”

“You get bunches of players like you do bananas, though that is a bad comparison.”

“Not many teams will come to Arsenal and get anything, home or away.”

“Shaun Wright-Phillips has got a big heart. It’s as big as him, which isn’t very big, but it’s bigger.”

“Nicolas Anelka left Arsenal for £23M and they built a training ground on him.”

“Maine Road was a great football stadium but as time moved on it stayed where it is”

Comments welcome. 😀

9 comments so far

  • Nev

    Jan 18, 2008 at 11:25 AM

    Comment #1

    I see were Ian Holloway got his inspiration from haha

  • Toon Al

    Jan 18, 2008 at 11:53 AM

    Comment #2

    im sorry, i love the man but he must be thick as shit for some of those corkers

  • tdt

    Jan 18, 2008 at 11:54 AM

    Comment #3


  • Andy T

    Jan 18, 2008 at 11:56 AM

    Comment #4

    I thought Chris Mort said one of the criteria for appointing a manager was that he spoke English!

  • Stamford Toon

    Jan 18, 2008 at 12:01 PM

    Comment #5

    Gaffs because in the heat of the moment he does not think clearly. Does not bode well for the future with the increased pressure he will be under at SJP. Or is he older and wiser?

  • Astidores Sanchez Blanco

    Jan 18, 2008 at 12:16 PM

    Comment #6

    I remember at the 1998 world cup game between England and Argentina when he was asked whether Batty would score his penalty, he said yes, and Batty missed it!

  • Bill f

    Jan 18, 2008 at 2:26 PM

    Comment #7

    Good, the press won’t have a clue what he is saying.

    Bad, they’ll just make it up anyway.

  • Leo*

    Jan 18, 2008 at 2:30 PM

    Comment #8

    jeez did you think he could see into the future, he was wrong about batty. who care, its all smoke and mirrors now anyway

    loving the SWP quote.

    loved watching the interview with keegan on ssn anyone else watch it?

  • Bottlodog

    Jan 18, 2008 at 2:44 PM

    Comment #9

    Yep,Leo, he was class
    Can’t wait for tomorrow – I’m Sooooooo excited
    I’m like a kid and I’m nearly 49!!!!!!


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