Newcastle United suffered a third consecutive defeat tonight against Real Mallorca in the final game of the Summer Cup by 1-0.
The only thing different about this game from the previous two was that the goal came at the start, after only 6 minutes, and was scored by Mario Suarez.
The team Kevin had out looked a patched-up team at best, with the average of the back four being just 21.
Newcastle now finish at the bottom of the league for the Summer Cup, and they didn’t even manage to get one point, with two defeats and no goals scored.
Not really what the Newcastle fans were looking for.
But our next game is just 3 days away and hopefully we’ll see a lot more of the regular first teamers in that game at St. James’ Park on Wednesday night, against Dutch powerhouse PSV Eindhoven.
The lads will have to start tightening up and playing some better football soon, with the Manchester United game just 14 days away.
Tonight Guthrie looked good but our best player was probably young 21 year-old French defender Sebastien Bassong, who really stood out.
Yes, we’ve only signed 3 players this season so far, but they all look good!
Hopefully our spirtis will be raised a bit tomorrow when hopefully Fabricio Coloccini will sign for us, and we think he could be a massive buy for the team.
Here is detailed report of the full game.
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It looks like Newcastle are playing Cacapa in a midfield defensive role with a back four of Edgar (20), Taylor (22), Bassong (21) and Enrique (22). That’s an average age of about 21 for the back four – we’ll see how they do, with the old man Cacapa (32) in front of them.
6 mins - Would you believe it. After just 6minutes Real Mallorca have gone ahead as the unmarked Mario Suarez puts home a free kick out on the left that gave goalkeeper Harper no chance.
Not a good start for the young defense.
11 mins – Young French central defender Bassong has under-hit a pass back to Harper and the goalkeeper has to come running out, and kicks the ball way into the stands – it’s a nervous start by Newcastle.
15 mins - Fernando Valero cut in from the outside left position and hits a shot that goes skyward – not hit quite right by the 28 year-old Spaniard from 20 yeards out.
20 mins - Miner’s persistence wins a corner on the right which James takes himself, but it fails to beat the first man and Mallorca easily clear the ball. Newcastle are finding it hard to get going.
24 mins – A deflected cross comes into the box but Jose Enrique clears up the danger nicely.
27 mins – James Milner manages to get in a low center, which is well placed and whipped across, but 31 year old 6’1†central defender José Carlos Nunes blasts the ball clear.
32 mins Milner gets in a wicked cross at the near post and Smith bravely goes in to get on the end of it, but is just beaten to the ball by Ramis, but the Mallorca defender receives treatment after a clash of heads with Smith – but he seems OK to carry on. Good aggressive play by Alan Smith
38min – Real Mallorca captain Juan Arango moves the ball forward and looks to pass it, but with the defense opening up in front of him he decides to shoot, but goes wide of Steve Harper’s goal.
39 mins - Oscar Trejo then tries a shot, but it lacks any real speed or direction and Harper saves the shot with consummate ease.
41min - Milner’s trickery wins a corner off the shins of Arango on the left. The winger crosses and the unmarked Bassong should open his Toon account but sees his downward header bounce wide of the target.
43min - Valera tries a shot from distance and it deflects off Seb Bassong and is rolling slowly for a corner before David Edgar comes across to kick the ball downfield.
The half-time whistle goes and Newcastle are still trying to get into this game.
48 mins - Damien Duff gets in a good across but again there’s nobody there to put the ball in the net – Owen, Martins and Viduka – please get fit soon.
50 mins - Valero gets into the penalty areas and gets in a good shot but Harper saves nicely low to his left.
53 mins – Mallorca make the first substitutions with Valero and Otchiko making way for Webo and Castro
55 mins - Guthrie loses the ball to Trejo and striker makes his way towards the Newcastle penalty area and gets past Claudio Cacapa – but Taylor is there and he clears nicely – good reading of the game by young Taylor, whose place will be under pressure when (and if) Coloccini finally arrives.
58 mins - Duff is fouled and Newcastle have a fee-kick some 265 yeards out, but Geremi shoots high wide and handsome – and nowhere near.
59 mins - Fraser Forster will come on for the last 30 minutes as pre-arranged., and he replaces the very safe and competent Steve Harper.
61 mins – The Hexham born giant keeper gets into the action quickly - and makes an easy save from Webo as he shoots from a tight angle.
67min - Mallorca break away quickly, and Trejo gets in a good effort around 17 yards, but young Forster saves nicely as he dives to his right to make a good stop.
68min - Mallorca make another change as Jurado comes on for Trejo, who has looked sharp in the last 15 minutes or so.
69 mins – Newcastle hand a first team debut to England Under-17 star (and local boy) Ryan Donaldson with the striker replacing Danny Guthrie.
73min - Mallorca are awarded a free lick just outside the penalty area and Mallorca captain Arango hits the ball with his left foot – and it just shaves the top of the crossbar, with Forster beaten, but it lands on top the net.
78 mins - Bassong out-muscles Webo to get the ball off the striker as he tries to make his way into the penalty area – this Bassong lad is no easy touch.
80 mins – Newcastle United take a corner and it’s Milner taking it again but the ball is easily headed away by the Mallorca defense.
If we don’t score soon we’ll finish up bottom of the league for the Summer Cup.
83 mins – Mallorca make another change as Diaz replaces Valero.
86min - Arango is replaced by Victor for another Mallorca change.
90 mins – The referee’s assistant indicates there will be 3 minutes of added on time
The whistle goes and it’s a third defeat on the tort for Kevin Keegan’s side, although the team was a weakened one because of the injuries to our players.
TEAMS
Newcastle United: Steve Harper, Steven Taylor, Jose Enrique, Claudio Cacapa, Sebastien Bassong, David Edgar, Geremi (c), Danny Guthrie, Damien Duff, James Milner, Alan Smith
Subs: Fraser Forster, Frank Wiafe Danquah, Ben Tozer, Mark Doninger, Ryan Donaldson, Jonny Godsmark
Real Mallorca: Miquel Angel Moya, Ivan Ramis, Josemi, Fernando Varela, Borja Valero, Kta Otchiko, Jose de Araujo Nunes, Mario Suarez, Juan Arango (c), Oscar Trejo, Enrique Corrales
Subs: Herman Lux, Jose Manuel Jurado, Marti Crespi, Pep Luis Marti, Ayoze Diaz, Pierre Webo, Gonzalo Castro, Javier Castellanos, Daniel Castellanos, Victor Casadesus, Oscar Diaz, Alberto Lopez
136 responses so far ↓
1 Craignufc // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:14
lets hope we perform better in the next game.
2 JK Muzzi // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:15
Donaldson is the best!
3 Toon1978 // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:15
Cant remember 1 decent shot on goal, cant remember a string of decent passes, the only good thing to come from this game is how good Bassong was. Maybe Bassong and Colocinni would make a good pairing in defence.
4 ACD // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:16
Bassong looked very good, and duff is getting there but the rest just looked tired !
looking forward to the home games to see what we can do because this tournament was a bit of a joke, i think it was used mainly for fitness and not results.
I wanna see if smith starts to run when he’s got 52,000 fans shouting at him because for him being a ”commited” player, he didnt look very instreseted to me tonight !
We desperately need a creative midfielder !
5 figsdad // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:16
well i though bassong did well..
enrique looked fit
guthrie looked good
edgar looked composed..
foster looked ok
as for s***e smith and milner
no comment
why does geremi take every free kick and taylor was at fault for the goal..
6 Irish John // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:16
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/sport/football/leagues/premierleague/newcastle/2494836/Anil-Ambanis-bid-to-buy-Newcastle-United-from-Mike-Ashley—football.html
im hoping this guy takes us over…I have a feeling Ashley wont want to sell though..He said already he wants partners and this guy does’nt seem to be interested in been a partner…I would be gutted if he took over leeds or shef wed
7 tino97 // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:17
I though we were generally lacklusture tonight. No creativity or spark. But won’t get too disapointed, its only pre-season and we are missing some decent players. At least Bassong looked good
8 Jongoodwyn // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:18
Poor match, but you have to remember the only real fit striker we had was Smith - should be a different picture next week when we have Owen and Martins back, as well as the 2 new signings KK has said he should be getting, and Jonas, with Beye back as well, hopefully.
Can hardly call it a first team match really - should be in much better shape with some half decent attacking players back, but as mentioned Duff and Bassong looked good.
9 Spyro // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:20
Bassong looks a steal, if he carries on like this there will be three CB’s seriously battling for first team action. Faye, Bassong & Coloccini
10 Elliott // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:20
Bassong looked very good. Calm, strong, pacy and good on the ball.
Let’s just remember he’s 22 and will probably make some mistakes.
11 scotty // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:21
I’m really struggling to find anything positive about smithy - he must have touched the ball no more than 10 times all game - and that was on his backside!!!
Good point seems to be Bassong - i wasn’t too sure about signing a trialist, but he looks the real deal. He reminds me of when we had Distin, looks quick, strong and can read the game well.
The Setanta commentators were all too quick to dismiss the season already with a few wise cracks. But they’re forgetting all the 1st choice strikers are out!!!
12 M.Stockley // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:21
TINO 97- your right we are mssing key players but its bad that we dont have a 2nd string of players goodenough to go out and put on a performance….. we need strength in depth the likes of smith, geremi, cacapa worry me! whats gonna happen if we go on a decent run next season and lose key players again to injury?! the clowns out there tonight couldnt cut the mustard bar a few!
13 M.Stockley // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:22
ps bassong did look solid! great capture there atleast
14 Jinal // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:22
Indeed, the only positive from today’s game was Bassong.
15 sirjasontoon // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:22
The weekend almost over..no new signings that Keegan mentioned.
another defeat…zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
16 Shola Ameobi // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:22
Lads, we had capaca playing in midfield tonight, that just sums up how many players where missing. We really need to take this result with a pinch of salt. Truth be told i was hoping we would do bad in this tournament, just to show Ashely how badly we need some new blood. Lets just hope we can feild a stronger side, mabeys even with a few new faces in before Valencia roles around.
17 Big Ricks Black Nd White Army // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:25
we my aswell have had harper upfront he probably would have done better than smith
18 Marguerite // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:25
I know we have a lot of injuries to key 1st team players, but KK must be tearing his hair out; Bassong excepted I would not give 2p for the rest of them. That was a slovenly performance.
19 Elliott // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:26
Smith is a complete joke, I honestly believe I would do a better job out there, he looks lost, never makes any runs, can’t control the ball, can’t stay on his feet. I don’t think he even contemplates shooting, I wonder is he knows that’s his job, playing up front?
I like the look of Derdiyok, I hope we get him. He probably wouldn’t score a hatful but he’s strong and quick, very very busy, gets all over the pitch and the ball just sticks to him. I imagine him doing a job for us like Benjani or Kuyt and scoring the odd belter. Fingers crossed.
20 domtoon // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:26
chatting in the chatbox was more fun than the game.
DISAPPOINTING, but not wholly unexpected…
21 Robby Bobson // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:26
Well before tonight the only good thing about Smith was his effort, even though he was like a headless chicken, but he seems to have given up on that now.
Bassong is a steal for 1.5million need to hurry up and actually get him signed! Although i think he will be more beneficial as a left back as he has all the attributes a full back needs, quick strong a nice pass and very very good at one on ones, which will allow Faye in the middle as he will have more aerial presence.
Hopefully with our “searching Europe for young talent”, we wont have missed Trejo tonight. He ran the show for Mallorca, reminds me alot of Olic crossed with Arshavin.
22 Gooderz // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:27
Nobody seems to be mentioning Edgar. I thought he had a fairly solid game tonight at RB.
If he builds on that performance (and continues to build himself up) then he could be a respectable backup to Beye, although he still won’t be a patch on Habib.
Meanwhile I’m hoping Smith and co are sold/booted out. They’d be some of the biggest transfers of the summer if that happened. Maybe we should try and sell Smith to McLaren stating how good he was against Arsenal and how he really upset their defence (he stole their sweeties) and would be perfect for their Champions League qualifier. He’d be a perfect replacement for Engelaar.
23 Obafan // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:29
Shola Ameobi - Do you really think Ahley watched this game or does care what the outcome was of this game? And do you think that he will change his mind after 2 1-0 defeats to splash the cash?
24 Spyro // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:29
Bassong—Faye—Coloccini—Beye
may prove to be our strongest defence
25 tino97 // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:30
we couldn’t string any passes together tonight. But even with those missing , I still don’t think we pass well enough. If Butt and Gutherie play CM we will never create many chances. Hopefully we will see some improvement this week. I’m sure we will.
26 Ashton // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:30
Bassong was good i think he is better than taylor who was again responsible for the goal , Enrique was good too i was impressed with his passing abilities
we should sell Milner to villa asap because he is shit he can’t do anything properly FFS ! plus we don’t need him any more
and we desperately need a creative midfielder
27 M.Stockley // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:31
Gooderz- i agree edgar did look solid tonight, he put in a coupleof good ballsand i defo think he is one for the future..but id be tempted to send him out on loan next season b4 we truley consider him a squad player…. he is good and full of potential though… but tbf at this rate we will need to keep him with the size of the squad!
28 Ashtoon // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:31
Why so many negative comments?
Its a pre-season friendly, yeah ok we shoulf of really done better, but look at our line up.
You wait till Martins, Owen and Viduka are back, Jonas will be immense supplying Owen!!
Owen is going to be extremely fit this season, he is very eager!!
Colloccin coming in tomorrow hopefully, that will sort our defence out big time, he is brilliant, and very experienced, he suits any league in the world how he plays.
Bassong looked great already, two games, two good displays, if he keeps playing like that i can see our two CB next season being Bassong and Coloccini.
We’re missing the Zog, Faye, Beye, Barton and dont forget the world class AMEOBI (get rid).
There are alot of positives, getting match fit, some play was looking good, Jonas especially friday night.
Still more players yet to come, dont get too down yet lads, wait till the season starts, im sure we will see a great season for the TOON still
29 Obafan // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:31
Is Bassong still not officially a NUFC player???
30 ToonKing // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:31
this game was just horrible….i’m shocked at how bad we were………….we could have played on for a week and not score………shocked…
31 Elliott // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:31
Aye Scotty he reminds me of Distin too. Distin seemed a fair bit more spaced out though when he was 22.
32 Mal // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:31
Looking for positives we were without beye, faye (or coloccini), butt, zog, jonas, oba, owen and viduka - that’s 8 outfield players all of who will probably start if fit - unless new signings come along. Tonight was woeful.
33 Warwick Hunt // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:31
Bassong looked very good in a very poor NUFC team, I know there where a lot of first choice players missing but I had hoped that some of the second choice would give KK something to think about.
I think that Bassong is going to push all of our CB all the way for their places, looks like a steal at the moment. With Curlychinny getting signed (hopefully) we may, at last, have a defense?
34 t-g-w // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:32
Someone else made this point earlier today and it eliminated the worries that I had about our club. Yes, we’ve been playing poorly in pre-season but it is a fact that a lot of our first choice players were missing. Obviously we still would have liked a better performance. If we say the teams around us are Everton, West Ham, Man City, portsmouth, Aston Villa, Blackburn and Spurs, the yids are the only team to have significantly strengthened. Even with the few signings we’ve made I would say at the moment we’ve leapfrogged all the rest. A back four of Beye, Coloccini/Taylor, Faye/Bassong, and Enrique looks very promising indeed. I really think that we only need 3 more players - a good LB to challenge Enrique, an attacking midfielder and a big striker. Taht may be a lot to ask before the Man U game but it is very possible before the end of the month. If we fill those positions I believe we could make it into Europe but duobt we will be challenging the top 4. Keep the Faith.
35 Big Ricks Black Nd White Army // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:33
roy keane is looking for a top striker, and i think he will find one with smith, he will prove loads of goals lol
keane please take him
36 MAG PIE // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:33
I thought Edgar and Bassong looked good tonight. Smith is doing nothing to repay Keegan’s faith.
On a positive note, all 3 signing so far look very good buys.
37 FOX TOON // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:33
I dunno why but I was expecting us to preform good 2nyt but yet again we were terrible. I no it’s only a friendly but it’s embarrassing, I think the only player who really shined 2nyt for us was Bassong.
Geremi is terrible! I have always thought this and now he’s really startin to P me of he can’t take a decent free kick his touch is awful he can’t cross for S##T.
I really hope we improve in the league because I could really see us gettin relegated if we keep playing this bad
38 Elliott // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:34
Ashton, I’d sell Milner for the £8m or whatever mentioned in a flash, he’s jsut not developing. I reckon we could pick up a better player for less too.
39 M.Stockley // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:35
i agree bout geremi, i havent ever rated him since he signed, way way too slow!
40 Robby Bobson // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:36
Obafan i don’t think so. I think its just the case of paper work. We should really hire a new secretary lol these things seem to take ages, like getting Gutierezz registration through.
41 Midjew // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:36
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/sport/football/leagues/premierleague/newcastle/2494836/Anil-Ambanis-bid-to-buy-Newcastle-United-from-Mike-Ashley—football.html
Hope so.
I WANT the BIG signings!! Lets get excited by big players
42 Big Ricks Black Nd White Army // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:36
geremi is the most over rated player in our team, was our captain, ashamed that he was even playing for us
43 simon376 // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:36
Shocking game tonight, but as everybody has said, we were missing a lot of our better players. Bassong looked really good to me tho, the only real plus point. As for Smith, I had high hopes this time last year when he signed, but what a let down. Please lets sell/give him away. At the very least, get him of the wage bill and that can make up what is needed to give Owen the same pay as he’s on now for his new contract. He may not have played much last season, but when he does, he puts the ball away, if he does that and gets us points and thats what matters. Entertains us fans and hopefully get us that bit higher up the table.
44 SingingSectionFan // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:37
Frazer Forster was good, nice to see a local lad getting a real chance. There wasnt much else to shout about. Its the creative midfielder we need, Milner will not adjust to playing there quick enough!
45 Spyro // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:37
i think milner should be used in the middle, but if someone offers 6 million or more we should sell and buy S.Larsson as he is already as good, if not better than Milner and you can see he improves with each game, unlike Milner who doesnt seem to be improving
i definitely think we need to employ some top class coaching staff though, we just seem unable to develop and take advantage of the talented young players we have
46 Big Ricks Black Nd White Army // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:38
if we get taken over it might be too late to buy players then, the takeover will probably take about a month though so ill doubt we will get time if they take over to get any transfers through
47 Midjew // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:40
Jan though
48 M.Stockley // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:41
ill maybe ring alan smith’s agent to inform him i need a new member of staff at my cinema to sweep screens! unfortunatley tho i wouldnt be able to offer him 60,000 a week! or if his heart is set on newcastle stay im sure theres a job in the club shop! useless t**t
49 MAG PIE // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:41
……………….harper,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
Beye…Coloccini..Bassong…Enrique
Jonas..NEW AM..Guthrie…NEW LW
…………Martins…NEW CF
New AM - Alonso
New LW - Arda
New CF - Ashton
TIME TO SPEND
50 Yeomsta // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:42
no owen, martins, viduka, given, n’zogbia, butt, guttierez, faye or beye…..smith up front, no older experienced defender….1-0 was a good result, this means nothing at all
51 joe // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:42
Godsmark, Danquah, Doninger. All 3 are very good prospects, yet they haven’t been given a kick despite being on bench for the last 4 games. Surely it was a chance to see what they can do when we already know that shola, snith, duff etc are s***e???
52 Robby Bobson // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:42
For next seasons sake i think a takeover would be bad. Ashley wouldn’t want to spend any money and there would be little/no time for transfers after the takeover. Although Ashley owns 100% so the takeover should be quicker than most.
Would be great for the future though to have the 6th richest man in charge. But i don’t really believe these stories as it was the News of the World reported it first, who every week seem to have some story about Newcastle that turns out to be *language that ed has banned*.
53 Rubber Guard // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:43
Bassong was head and shoulders above Taylor tonight who was at fault for the goal by not marking their striker well enough. I felt Edgar had a good solid game at RB and played good long balls and overlapped when he could. KK will see he will be good backup for Beye. Bassong can also play LB and cover for Enrique. We also have Faye as CB cover and as much as I dont see him as a CB Taylor. I was quite impressed at the young defence’s performance tonight but the midfield and strikers were woeful
54 Big Ricks Black Nd White Army // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:43
good team mag pie, but do u see us getting alonso?
55 ObaFan2 // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:45
Forster did OK
Bassong best NUFC player
Taylor Ok
Duff ok but didn’t create anything and let down by poor passing to him.
Edgar did ok
Donaldson did more in 20 minutes than Smith in 2 matches.
Enrique I still think will do well.
Gutherie not his best game so far.
Milner same old….
Smith USE-less
rest not even worth mentioning.. boring, dire, uninspiring and hope for a better team and display at SJP on Wednesday and Saturday.
Roll on the legend to be …… Oba
56 MAG PIE // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:46
Big Rick - why not? Maybe the deal is done and L’pool want to delay to bring down the Barry price?
57 Obafan // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:46
Robby Bobson - That just says it all, doesn’t it? Bassong is still not officially a NUFC player? This shows how much Ashley and his staff know about the football business. He might be a good businessman but he doesn’t know a f*ck about leading a football club.
3 signings so far (and hope more to follow)
- Gutierrez: took ages to get his regestration
- Guthrie: no problem
- Bassong: still work to do
I don’t understand that. I really don’t.
MA has lost my support; he really has.
I hope I will have to apologise (tho’ ti be with the bloggers here) that he just turns to be a good owner, but I doubt it.
58 Ashton // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:47
Why nobody is mentioning Milner !! he was our shitist player by a mile ! he was horrible he lost most of the balls smith was better than him at least smith was passing the ball without losing it !!
fickle
59 Big Ricks Black Nd White Army // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:49
i think alonso is a quality player, but i think he wouldrather play for a team in europe, i doubt we will get him, but it has been quiet with him and most of our sigings came out of the blue, so it maybe true hopefully
60 Spyro // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:50
Ashton man have criticised Milner already, me included.
Bassong IS signed what are you guys on about!?
61 buddy // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:50
missed the game but its nothing short of embarassing. 3 games without a goal all against average opposition.
i would be highly critical of keegans reluctance to play young guys, im sure we MUST have a younger central mid and striker so WHY play players out of position. it makes no sense. come on kev, wake up!
smith just gets worse, wat an arsehole
we were missin an awful lot of players but that could happen mid season(like last year) and we cd easily go on anuder losing streak. we need 4-5 players stil
glad to hear about bassong tho!! signings seem to be good so far
62 BenjiToon // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:50
I said it after Friday’s game and I’ll say it again…don’t judge anything by the games in this tournament. The whole point of this trip was to bond the players together and improve fitness.
Yes it was poor going forward but we weren’t actually that bad defensively. Bassong has surely given himself a shout of a few prem starts now. Edgar was thew weak link actually, not Taylor.
Smith should be given this season to try and force his way into the team but the reality is there are 3 (Owen, Martins, Viduka), possibly four (Carroll) or 5 (Gutierrez can play as 2nd striker), players ahead of him. Besides smith needs someone mobile alongside him to be any good as a battering ram.
Wait for PSV and Valencia before we judge Kev’s team.
63 joe // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:50
By the way, we need a presence on the pitch. A striker, someone who scares the shit out of other teams. Offer Berbatov a fortune, he will come. He is black n white daft.
64 Elliott // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:52
tgw - I know what you’re saying, provided we get Colo and have back up full backs by whatever means I’m happy with the defence.
I’m pretty happy with our strikers but I’d prefer to get someone like Derdiyok in, who can keep the ball and get shot of Smith.
Midfield however we have massive problems.
Take Barton out of the equation and we have NOTHING in CM. Guthrie looks ok, Butt is ok, Geremi is piss poor there, Milner cant keep hold of the ball, Zogs is not ready there yet. Now think of all the other mid table teams and see what they have in CM. We have no goals in our CM and no assists, no set piece specialists and no pace, no runners.
Our wings I can cope with but to be honest (presuming Guittierez is ok) I think we can do a lot better than Milner, Duff and Zogs. Zogs is brilliant on his day but that’s once or twice a season. Keegan could turn him around. The other 2 can’t put in a decent cross, dally on the ball and let the moves break down while they do their head-down-beat-man-check-check-again—-check-again-rubbish-cross-move. Frankly very average.
We had, 5 years ago, Nobby and Robert on the wings. Each would set up about 3 chances a game with a peach of a cross, score about 5 free kicks a season, put decent corners in get about 10+ assists and chip in more goals too.
Compare that to what we have now.
I’m very worried by our midfield.
65 Obafan // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:52
MAG PIE - Why do you even think a deal may have been done? Come on, we are all focussing on Colo and the staff can’t handel 2 things at the same time. They even can’t complete a signing properly (read my post n°57)
66 Spyro // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:52
Alonso is class and i suggested him as soon as Juve signed Poulsen and the deal fell through. However, like Rick says, he probably wont want to come to us, we are a step down, he could easily sign for Arsenal, AC Milan etc
67 Big Ricks Black Nd White Army // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:53
berbatov used to sleep with a newcastle top on when he was a boy, but he will not come to us
68 ronaldeano // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:53
@Obafan, ive been saying it for months, along with ‘i hate prawn sandwiches’.
Tight Ashley is a very good buisnessman. If he sells the club for 260 million, he will make 30 million profit in only 1 year of owning NUFC. N
69 Pit Yaka // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:55
Never seen so much crap for a pre season as I did that. Not even in the running. Newcastle will bet the worst team in the NEast this season . What a big headed backside wiper is Taylor. He is rubbish man! Out should go Smith, Ame-o-ba_I’m crap, Taylor-i’m-fit-fpt-Arsenal-Spurs-or-Cheslea-Not, Bard-ton, Cracapa etc. This is just the worst shower of crap I’ve ever seen. Ashley should just sell the club as he hasn’t a clue. Bobby Robson must be appalled. Shame on the supporters for wasting their money during a credit crunch. Mindless maurons. Some of the comments on here are desperate. Stop fooling yourselves we are crap!!! Keegan will walk, he is silly to stick his reputation on the line for the likes of Bard-ton. I love the guy Keegan but he has mad a twat of himself man!
70 Obafan // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:55
Ashton - I think Milner is one of the worst player we have in our squad: he can’t center; dribbles 1 opponent 5 times and then loses the ball; runs like a headless chicken; has got no intelligence at all and some here think he will be a very good CAM. Come on, he is crap and he is not improving at all. Get rid of him and use the money on good players, cause we desperately need them!
71 Spyro // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:56
great post Elliot, the “check-check-beat man-check etc” is hilarious but so true, lol
72 Robby Bobson // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:58
Spyro
“Newcastle United hope to complete the signing of FC Metz defender Sebastien Bassong after he agreed terms and completed a medical at St James’ Park. ” That was 31st and heard nothing since. Commentators on setanta also said he has not officially signed.
I’m not saying that he’s not going to sign or suggesting the Spuds will nip in or anything, i think its certain he will, but it’s just taking time. I just think we need to be more efficient in getting players signed on the dotted line.
As Milner is concerened he has been very very poor pre-season but i think he is a good player, and usually puts in good crosses. Tonigt he didn’t really have much hope with crosses cus it was always just Smith in the middle. This is the season he needs to come out and make himself a concrete starter though and cut out the thing about taking on the same player 3 times, as he is 22 and no longer a youngster.
73 Obafan // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:58
ronaldeano - let’s hope then he is happy with a £30m profit and sells now instead of him waiting another year and getting us more trouble.
It does make sense. Buying a club on a cheap with a financial debt; clearing that debt and then attracting rich companies and persons who want to buy the club, completely free of financial problems.
74 Ashton // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:59
and why the f*** should milner play as a CM ! he can’t bloody pass the ball and he can’t defend nor attack he can’t do anything
75 Big Ricks Black Nd White Army // Aug 3, 2008 at 23:59
has anyone seen jonny godsmark play,he could hve good potential, he could be a good player if he gets his shooting better, has bags of pace, prob would be one of the quickest in prem
anyone agree comments please
76 buddy // Aug 4, 2008 at 0:00
our central midfield is our problem full stop. they left our defence very isolated last year and did little for atack.
butt is 100 percent commited but waaay too far past it, ive never seen geremi play well and he aint no cm. guthrie will not good enough yet(hope im rong). barton may not b around.
so if not 1 cm we prob need 2
1= a proper solid dm nd fit as hell
2= someone wit a bit of flair and creativity
im getting more and more anxious
hopefully im rong and just being a moaner but i think not thus far
77 matt // Aug 4, 2008 at 0:01
realistic targets:
If we have any hope of finishing seventh, we’ll need these guys
Arda Turan - replace milner
Eren Derdiyok - 12+ assists, probably 7 or 8 goals
Coloccini - still not official
Burdisso/Warnock - probably wnt be burdisso with the injury crisis in defence at Inter
Inler - replace Butt, A better option for a DM, attacks well, but gets back
Skjelbred - seems promising, nufc fan and we could get him on the cheap.
What do you guys think?
78 Obafan // Aug 4, 2008 at 0:01
Robby Bobson - I completely agree. The staff look like a bunch of amateurs who cant complete a signing.
79 Spyro // Aug 4, 2008 at 0:02
he looked good tonight rick i must admit, Ashton calm down, Milner aint great but he aint that bad.
80 Pit Yaka // Aug 4, 2008 at 0:03
Too add insult to injury, Gary Speed has another 2 years left in him at least. No one in midfield can hold a candle to hinm for me at the moment. Geremi is nothing but a joke. Get rid.
81 AndyNUFC // Aug 4, 2008 at 0:07
Milner needs to sort out his crossing and distribution that’s for sure. Looked so off his game tonight. Edgar was not weakest link by far, had a solid game.
82 Robby Bobson // Aug 4, 2008 at 0:08
Big Ricks Black Nd White Army
i watched him against Liverpool reserves and even the scouse commentators rated him. He has alot of potential from what i saw and i think he scored. Hopefully his size doesn’t stop him from being a prem player.
83 dave v // Aug 4, 2008 at 0:08
l would love to see this takeover happen, it would allow KK to bring in the kind of players he thinks we the supporters deserve.
Mike Ashley l will be eternally grateful if you are the man who makes yours and our club great within the world of football.
l for one will never forget that it was MIKE ASHLEY who unleashed your clubs potential.
The game tonight was poor but KK seems to have unearthed a gem in Bassong.
84 Ashton // Aug 4, 2008 at 0:10
Obafan
Some people here just adore him because he run’s !! well f**k that every human being can f***ing run we need talented footballers not people who can ” run “!
85 Shola Ameobi // Aug 4, 2008 at 0:11
Obafan - Its three 1-0 defeats in a row now….. he doesn’t even have to watch the game, just look at the team sheet to realise how weak we are. If we field a similar team against valencia and psv it will be 5 defeats in a row, and pre season or not, thats not good.
86 Spyro // Aug 4, 2008 at 0:13
tbh none of our defenders were a weak link tonight, Taylor wasn’t bad and nor was Edgar. we had the odd lapse, and thats why we conceded but even the best defences shut off one or two times per match.
87 Obafan // Aug 4, 2008 at 0:14
Ashton
I completely agree. Some here think he must play in a CAM role, but then we defo will lack creativity. I really can’t see why they didn’t take the money Villa offered. On the other hand i can’t understand why Villa offered that amount of money for such an overrated player.
88 Obafan // Aug 4, 2008 at 0:18
Shola Ameobi - Indeed I forgot the Doncaster game. I think preseason is important not especially for the results but to gel a team and to get a possitive feeling about the nearing season.
With these reaults it will be very hard to start positive and if you see the fixtures we have to begin with; it doesn’t look bright at all. After September we might be bottom of the table and our confidence will be low again so it will be very hard to get back on track. By then KK may be sacked and then we are on oulog hard relegation battle.
I hope my crystal bowl is completely rong with this, but there need so much changing before the end of August.
89 ronaldeano // Aug 4, 2008 at 0:19
MA bit off a lot more than he could chew in his chubby little mouth when he baught NUFC.
He did not understand what this club means to all us Geordies.
He thinks that he can do an Arsenal and and make as much money as he can out of us all.
The word ‘Deluded’ springs to mind. If he thinks Dennis Wise is as good at Arsene Wenger at spotting a cheap player and turning him into a superstar, he needs to see a Psychiatrist that can slap him into the real world.
I respect MA for what he has acheved in his life, but imo, he is using NUFC for his own financial gain. He is NOT from Newcastle, and he will NEVER know how it feels to be a proud Geordie who works his nuts off all week to go to the match and look after his wife and kids.
I hope that Tottenham Hotspur finish below us next season so we can visit thair blog site and ridicule them for what they realy are….. A bunch of deluded balloon heeds with grapes for brains and a Lego stadium, just like the Mackems.
90 Eyeball // Aug 4, 2008 at 0:27
CM is our biggest problem, look at the top 4
Man U - Carrick
Arse - Fabregas
L’Pool - Alonso
Chel - Lampard
All of the big 4 have someone in Midfield who can pop up with the odd goal, pass, break down play etc
We have nothing like that, or if you dissagree you have to admit that our CM players aren’t in the same league!!
Christ if we cant buy the players at least see if we can get someone in on a loan deal….Example Denilson or Merida of arsenal
91 ScottyT // Aug 4, 2008 at 0:34
lack of creativity is scary. however lack of strikers was jst as big a problem tonight. thank god we have players like owen vid oba to come back in.
imo we need coloccini, another left back, 1 or 2 creative flair centre mids and a striker. thats still 5 players to even have a chance of top half tbh.
also wat kind of a internet name to hv is shola ameobi lol.
92 Spyro // Aug 4, 2008 at 0:38
“Newcastle’s owner denies seeking Indian takeaway”
Another classy headline from the southern press, embarrassing
93 Kevin // Aug 4, 2008 at 0:41
Eyeball I see your point but look at all the quality the top four posess in EVERY OTHER POSITION AS WELL…..
94 ronaldeano // Aug 4, 2008 at 0:42
And another thing……
Chelsea are just a blob of human excrement who got lucky because a very rich conman saved them from extingsion.
There will come a time when Red Rom picks up his ball and shot puts his skinny little bum out of Stamford Bridge with his wedge thats as big as Vanessa Feltzes rear end.
And i will giggle my my Skinny little Northern pubes off!!!
HOWAY THE TOON!!!
95 Yorkie Dave // Aug 4, 2008 at 0:44
sounds like cashley was in marjorca!
http://www.dailyexpress.co.uk/posts/view/55308
96 Toooooooooooooooooon // Aug 4, 2008 at 0:44
why do geremi take all those freekicks? milner can do better than him….
97 ronaldeano // Aug 4, 2008 at 0:45
@Spyro, are you a tight Ashley lover, or a skin tight Ashley hater?
98 Black and White Blood // Aug 4, 2008 at 0:48
We need players - Please BUY before it’s too late
99 Spyro // Aug 4, 2008 at 0:49
neither, i can see points for and against MA, but at the end of the day none of us REALLY know what is going on, its all just media speculation, impatience & hot air
100 ronaldeano // Aug 4, 2008 at 0:52
“I’m loving it,†said Ashley, from the VIP area of Real Mallorca’s Ono stadium.
MA says………
“I am excited by the new season, of course I am. I am really looking forward to it. I am excited by Kevin Keegan, seeing the team play, all of it. I think we are going to have a bit of fun.â€
It wont be much fun when our wafer thin squad gets thinner when (god forbid) injurys kick in and players get suspended etc
Does MA want to be buried with his huge wallet?
101 Yorkie Dave // Aug 4, 2008 at 0:54
nah steal his wallet first
102 Spyro // Aug 4, 2008 at 0:56
However, i do expect 3 more signings in at the very least as its what we need.
Coloccini
Skjelbred
Inler
would drastically improve our squad
103 ronaldeano // Aug 4, 2008 at 1:07
As much as i hate to say it….
We are still a poor side atm. We are expecting things that we are not capable of atm. It is all MA’s fault because he is reluctant to part with vast sums of money that he couldent possibly spend in his lifetime. He says he wants to have ‘fun’ with our club?
Very greedy man imo
104 AndyNUFC // Aug 4, 2008 at 1:09
I think the Ashley haters are just short sighted, pessimistic doomsdayers who can’t acknowledge the fact that this has been an incredibly slow transfer market for every club.
105 reillers // Aug 4, 2008 at 1:12
Again really disapointing. Grant it we were missing some of our starters like Given, Owen and Martins. But yet again the lads who played didn’t seem to care at all, not even a wee bit.
We’re not going anywhere, if anything we’re going backwards. It kills me to see it but if we don’t do something, everyone will move ahead of us, including Sunderland. Keane is given the freedom to buy who he wants with the money to support him, we’ve bought feck all players, we look awful, our attitude is crap, unprofessional. We’ve so much work to be done before the end of the August.
106 D.C. // Aug 4, 2008 at 1:14
Aside from the keepers, Bassong and 2nd-half Duff, we were garbage. I get that we didn’t have our first-choice RB, but otherwise we had a backline that might be considered first choice. Our midfield doesn’t have that much creativity even if we figure that Jonas and Butt will be there. Up front, we have four strikers better than Smith but two of them are injury-prone and one is unproven. If we don’t make significant upgrades in the next month, I fear for this club, in all seriousness. With the additions we’ve made, a marginal improvement is the best we can hope for.
107 ronaldeano // Aug 4, 2008 at 1:17
Sell up Mike, you havent a clue about what NUFC means to the fans
We are not a toy to be played with
If you want a toy to play with, go to woolies, not our club.
Fake ass conman
108 SINGAPORE // Aug 4, 2008 at 1:52
After reading all the comments
Few things to sum up
1) Milner S*CKS! His only attribute is
he can run and he run headlessly.
Given can cross better then this lad.
2)Smith is rubbish as usual. Needless to
say anymore. What is Kevin
Thinking? 0 goals 0 assists for last 2
seasons. Do KK really think he can
score??lol
3)Bassong looked a real steal. Hopefully
4)All NUFC fans are really worried
about the future. That is for sure.
109 ronaldeano // Aug 4, 2008 at 1:56
@Singapore, can you blame us mate! ?
110 Nathan // Aug 4, 2008 at 2:11
Oh please…as if this result means anything, a squad stretched by injuries in a pre-season friendly, all we needed was Charlie or Jonas in the midfield and Oba or Owen up front and it would have been entirely different, wait until the game against Valencia.
111 reillers // Aug 4, 2008 at 2:23
Nathan, no the result doesn’t mean anything, the preformance and the attitudes of some of the players says a lot. A lot of teams have been involved in friendlies over the last few weeks, but the most of them played, played well and did a professional job. You had players out their giving it their all who are fighting for first team places. Every single player on that team just looked like they didn’t give to shites. Like Harper for Christ sake you think he’d try and seize this opportunity with Given having a tight thigh, did he, no. Did any of our backs shine themselves in glory no they made themselves look like wee clowns. Duff was good fine, but like Milner runs like a headless chicken and crosses like one too. Smith is more then a wee bit of a joke. It’s hard to believe he played for Man U. A lot needs to be done before the end of the month. Ya we were missing Given, Owen, Martins..etc, but that’s not the point, the players out there should have been showing Keegan why he should pick them and not let us questioning our sanity instead.
112 reillers // Aug 4, 2008 at 2:26
Nathan..It was a joke. The result didn’t matter but the game did. Their attitude, preformance, everything, it was just so bad. Most clubs in friendlies do a professional job. They show up and play well. Most clubs have players fighting it out for first team spots not standing there acting like they don’t care.
For God’s sake like you swear someone like Harper would have grabbed this occasion with both hands seeing as Given wasn’t risked, but did he..no. Did anyone on the field show us, besides Duff, why Keegan should pick them. Milner was a joke, like a headless chicken, running up and down, and crossing like one too. Smith, there are no words to describe him. The fact that he actually played with Man U once upon a time is more then a wee bit baffling. A lot needs to be done in very little time.
113 ginkoh // Aug 4, 2008 at 4:35
Performance like this is unacceptable this season. Not even worth to watch this kind of game.
For my opinion It’s very fuxxing bad football, No technique no tactic no teamwork nothing. Players don’t know how to creative, nobody find the space for team just run like headless chic. How dare they can say they play high level football, sometime i thought i’m watching highschool football match.
Ok just friendly match, but with this attitude like this, avoid the relegation is highest goal we got -”-) anytime i watch other team play, I always upset compare with our team. Football is hurt again no entertain anymore for me last night and may this season too. I pray for god, Hope it’s wrong.
114 obamagic // Aug 4, 2008 at 5:48
Clearly shows the hunger and drive of the second team…
115 D.C. // Aug 4, 2008 at 6:26
Looks like Bassong will be our best defender, and Guthrie our best midfielder. How sad is that?
116 andy // Aug 4, 2008 at 7:04
Cheer up! its not sad mate, it shows the new guys were worth the dosh - I think things are on the up for nufc, we’re starting from zero . . 6 months from now we’ll be more than a mid table team imho . . . . . just wait and see, this years got ‘cracker’ written all over it - after all we havent lost a epl game yet!
117 Ericles // Aug 4, 2008 at 7:10
Incoherent and disjointed. Bassong and Guthrie contributed well. Nonetheless KK must not persist with Smith. Once again Smith showed that he is well out of the frame and well over the hill. Useless. We need quality new blood and the best players back soon. Or else. Takeover talk is just another media ploy to destabilise. On last nights performance we do not need any help from the press.
118 andy // Aug 4, 2008 at 7:41
poor smith, come on lads the guy has feelings and all. Maybe his mind just wasnt on the job, maybe thinking about his taxes or something . . his highligh real on YouTube is cool, heavy metal music and all . . . . cough.
119 Ian // Aug 4, 2008 at 8:34
——————-Given———————
Beye—Coloccini—Bassong—Enrique
Jonas————-Inler—————Arda
——————-Owen———————
———-Martins—–Derdiyok———–
I fancy that side, arda and jonas are skilled enough to allow owen to play as a second striker to martins and derdiyok, and inler could hold down the midfield with a very attack oriented side.
120 dick // Aug 4, 2008 at 8:48
never been pessimistic at the start of a season before, but it looks really bad this year, even if we get all our players back from injury the strikers and midfield Martins aside are totally lacking in any form of skill or pace, we have’nt got one match winning player in squad , if we avoid relagation I’ll be delighted
121 steve // Aug 4, 2008 at 8:49
berbatov used to sleep with a shearer shirt on - unfortunately he aint a toon supporter - I’ve actually met him and asked him that very question, he said he used to like them as a kid but now he doesn’t support any team!
122 Lamesley Mag // Aug 4, 2008 at 8:53
Matt, generally agree to your proposed transfers but prefer:
Arda Turan - to replace “Duff”; i.e. saving in salary; but let’s keep Milner who still has potential…..*
Eren Derdiyok - hopefully this week……
Coloccini - hopefully official today….
Warnock/Shorey - either will improve the team provided we can buy at right price…..
Inler - to replace Butt for the 2009~10 season, so let’s bed him in now……
Rio-Coker - to replace Barton if he’s suspended long term…..**
Skjelbred - at the right price, we should bring him in this week…..
Building for the future, this will allow us to loan out:
Carroll
Edgar
Either Forster or Krull
Maybe Tozer
We still need to sell the following before the month’s end:
Ameobi
Smith
Duff*
Barton**
123 benny // Aug 4, 2008 at 9:00
ANOTHER POOR PERFORMANCE. WE LOOK WORSE THAN LAST SEASON
124 Ross // Aug 4, 2008 at 9:04
ian-i’d bite the hand from the arm of the fella that was offering that team to start against man utd.
125 Ross // Aug 4, 2008 at 9:05
steve-ive been trying to say that on here,lol.
alot of people claiming he’s a toon fan and he’d love to come to us, thats not the case at all.
he was a shearer fan, hence the shirt with his name on it!
126 dick // Aug 4, 2008 at 9:21
reports coming out now that ambani takeover is compleatly false, so all this speculation about all these great players we will be going for is a waste of time, I think we start this season with the team we have now, maybe 1 or 2 other players at the most
127 totsy // Aug 4, 2008 at 10:00
this was todays team:
Steve Harper, Steven Taylor, Jose Enrique, Claudio Cacapa, Sebastien Bassong, David Edgar, Geremi (c), Danny Guthrie, Damien Duff, James Milner, Alan Smith
Subs: Fraser Forster, Frank Wiafe Danquah, Ben Tozer, Mark Doninger, Ryan Donaldson, Jonny Godsmark
this is our 1st team:
Shay Given, Habib Beye, Abdoulay Faye, Fabrico Coloccini, Jose Enrique, Jonas Gutierrez, James Milner, Joey Barton, Charles Nzogbia, Obafemi Martins, Micheal Owen
subs: Steve Harper, Sebastian Bassong, Steven Taylor, Alan Smith, Nicky Butt, Mark Viduka.
this clearly shows you that you cant judge the team on last nights performance, only one player from last night is in the first team with three making the bench.
128 Will // Aug 4, 2008 at 10:14
Smith was absolutely appauling.
Bassong was very impressive though.
129 brian // Aug 4, 2008 at 10:18
Alan Smith cannot be on this team. He struggles with everything he does - even hustling. It makes us look pitiful. James Milner had a rough game but at least he was trying.
130 Swift nextsoccerstar // Aug 4, 2008 at 10:29
…it was just a work-out to build fitness……it was just a work-out to build fitness…it was just a work-out to build fitness…it was just a work-out to build fitness - keep repeating until the stupor takes over and you forget that the new season is just around the corner.
131 MMNUFC // Aug 4, 2008 at 10:31
Dont think anyone should start and get to down about these results there just friendlies and mean nothing. We were missing almost a entire team and all of our first choice forwards, hopefully we have a few more quality targets we are looking to bring in before the mancs game.
Bassong looks a good prospect as does guthrie and our 2(hopefully colo deal done today) other sigings so far have been argentinian internationals. Lets hope we can get a quality link man for CM and a forward who can hold the ball and get on the end of things.
132 robertsa // Aug 4, 2008 at 10:41
at the end of the day we played a strong team and lost.our defence is still all over the place. our midfield has no ideas. get in collocini get in burdisso get in baptista.
given
beye collocini faye burdisso
gutierez baptista milner
martins viduka owen
incredibly strong, tall, ugly, reliable defense.
hard working men on the wings with a powerhouse down the middle.
proven goal scoring formula upfront.
133 Swift nextsoccerstar // Aug 4, 2008 at 10:55
My main worry is the ability of our strikers to stay fit. Viduka is never going to last a full season, neither is Owen. Martins might do, but I wouldn’t bet a tenner on it.
That leaves us with Alan Smith and Shola.
There are more goals in synchronised swimming than in that two.
134 Marty // Aug 4, 2008 at 11:03
EYEBALL,you mention just 1 quality midfield player for the top four teams but the reality is that they have at least 4 each n more on the bench.
I believe the top 4 have a better midfielder on the bench than we have in the squad,this is being very realistic lads.
We are way understrength for the season ahead
135 Eyeball // Aug 4, 2008 at 11:57
@ Kevin & Marty
I agree the strength of their squads is good, I only named one midfielder coz I couldnt be chewed to type all of them lol
Its depressing when you think that we’re paying for Fat freddys cock ups now and if we tighten the purse strings to much A) we wont get the quality signings we need B) could slip further down the league because of it.
Anyway I’ll end on a plus point… I have complete faith in KK he can get us up there….if he’s not made to play the part of ashleys monkey!!!
Howay the Toon!!!!
136 xfer // Aug 4, 2008 at 12:20
Curlychinny? Nice… Made me laugh.
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