Initial warning – this article is not meant to be taken too seriously.
Newcastle have unveiled a new superhero – who will undoubtedly be a huge advantage in our both in the Premier League games and in Europe too, and he should help us to move up the league table quickly, and even win the Europa league this season – it’s the new superhero Whey Aye Man.
Whey Aye Man – Newcastle United super-hero – he plays on the right wing
But it looks like Alan Shearer to us
And for those uninitiated in the Geordie dialect Whey Aye Man – means simply – well – yes – but Geordies have a way with words and this rather beautiful phrase replaces the rather bland yes.
And it rivals – “I’m ganning Yem” as one of the really great Geordie phrases.
For instance you will get a whey aye man if you ask any Geordie if we’ll hammer Sunderland two weeks come Sunday, and you always get a whey aye man – when a Geordie is asked if they would like another pint in the local pub – top scientists at Newcastle University have recently discovered it ‘s all in the DNA – the Geordie DNA.
This is great news and our inside information is that there was an internal battle going on within the club between the super hero and Spiderman, and a certain Jonas Gutierrez was said to be particularly keen on Newcastle adopting the Spiderman outfit.
Perhaps the Argentine thought he could play Spiderman – no – that cannot be true – that would be too daft – Jonas would need more than that mask of his to do that.
The Whey Aye Man outfit has been unveiled by Newcastle United this week – with his black and white wig and mask, ripped physique (I wouldn’t need that part of the outfit), and club y-fronts (yes – I’ll need them) – which look terrific.
It’s probably going to be a favorite for the upcoming Halloween, but that puts me in just a little bit of a dilemma, as I had my heart set on that Elvis Presley outfit, and that black wig and sideburns look just great, and I even know all the words to “I’m All Shook Up.”
And after all I’ve been practicing “thank you very much, I’ll do my very best” for about forty years now – or is it fifty?
Oh well – decisions decisions – they have to be made.
Newcastle have just released the outfit and it’s priced at a competitive £49.99, and we expect to see a few of them at the game against Manchester United on Sunday – and they should scare the living daylights out of the Red Devils players – and that has to be good.
The Whey Aye Man outfit is available to buy in Newcastle club stores and Shearer’s Bar.
We leave you with just one question – where’s the Whey Aye Woman’s outfit?
That could be some outfit, and my wife Madeleine would look great in it – for sure.
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