The Newcastle United Blog

News and Commentary On Newcastle United Football Club By Ed Harrison, A Proud Exiled Geordie And Lifelong Fan

The Newcastle United Blog header image 2
Howay The Lads!!

Eight Players Certain To Leave Newcastle This Summer

4:22 pm, Monday, April 14th, 2014 by Dr. Ed Harrison · 207 Comments

Newcastle will be having a mini clear-out after what has turned into a second half debacle this season and we’ve lost 12 of the last 17 games, and failed to score in 12 of them. :(

gabby obertan

Gabby Obertan - will leave in summer

Players who will definitely be moving on are out of contract players Shola Ameobi and Dan Gosling, even though Dan has played well for Newcastle in our last two games, when he finally was given a chance.

Romain Amalfitano and Gabby Obertan are two Frenchmen who have simply not made it at Newcastle and are not good enough, and  will also be moved out – and probably back to France.

Two loan players will also not be at Newcastle next season but for different reasons.

Loic Remy want sot move to a great club – and Luuk de Jong has not been good enough – and it may be he is not given many chances over the last 4 games, having already appeared in 10 games with no goals, and he’s never looked like scoring.

And it seems that Jonas Gutierrez has played his last game for Newcastle and will put on sale for £3M in the summer, and Conor Newton – on loan at St. Mirren for a second successive season will not get a contract renewal this summer.

And other players who could possibly leave in the summer include Ben Arfa, Sylvain Marveaux, Steven Taylor, Davide Santon, Papiss Cisse, Fabricio Coloccini  and Mapou Yanga-Mbiwa.

But Newcastle have to be very careful that we don’t throw the baby out with the bath water – so to speak.

Some of those players are very good and Ben Arfa and Sylvain Marveaux have loads of skill, but it was worrying that Alan Pardew refused to even talk about Ben Arfa after Saturday’s defeat at Stoke City.

We shouldn’t lose much more than eight this season, because replacing them all could then be very difficult.

Comments welcome.

Tags: Conor Newton · Dan Gosling · Gabriel Obertan · Jonas Gutierrez · Loic Remy · Luuk de Jong · Newcastle News · Romain Amalfitano


207 responses so far ↓

  • 1 jesperfuglsang - captain of the lemon crew // Apr 14, 2014 at 4:29 PM

    You know the more I think about it the less players I think will leave ;)

    …cause we sure as hell are not buying anyone (well maybe one or two according to Charnley)

  • 2 BandB // Apr 14, 2014 at 4:33 PM

    Elliot, Dummett, S Taylor, R Taylor, Williamson, Mbiwa, Haidara, Tiote, Anita, Sissoko, Gouffran, Gosling, Bigirimana, Obertan, Sa Ameobi, Sh Ameobi, Cisse.

    These are the players I think most likely to be deemed first team squad players with a future at the beginning of pre-season. Add to that Abeid and Jonas (for the appearance of numbers early-on), and the “golden generation” of Newton, Good, Armstrong, and Campbell.
    Add a couple of loanees and up to £15 million in signings (though I think we’ll show another healthy profit on transfers.)
    This will be presented as Pardew “doing a Martinez” and unloading expensive flops, replacing them with cheaper players who buy into his “vision.”
    We will then storm up the league into fifth place playing an exciting brand of attacking football and I will join the stampede to renew season tickets all-round for me and my grateful family.

  • 3 mindcompressor // Apr 14, 2014 at 4:33 PM

    i prefer them leave and don’t hold place in squad/bench for guys like aarons or good. let’s be honest, even if we don’t but anyone special, we will be struggling in avoiding relegation battle with obertan or amalfitano in line-up…

    of course, that would be good to keep ben arfa, krul, sissoko, mbiwa or santon – however, we need proper manager who can use these guys on the pitch and drag best of their skills and form for NUFC…

    hard to see it happen, however i’m fan… so, deep in my soul i believe…

  • 4 jesperfuglsang - captain of the lemon crew // Apr 14, 2014 at 4:37 PM

    I think Abeid will be leaving (I think a deal was struck when he went out on loan)

  • 5 guvnor // Apr 14, 2014 at 4:46 PM

    As long as Teflon Pardew goes as well, the clown hasn’t gave the players on the bench a chance to prove themselves. The man is a poor excuse for a manager.

  • 6 guvnor // Apr 14, 2014 at 4:47 PM

    Gosling played well on Saturday but still got subbed.

  • 7 Greebol1892 // Apr 14, 2014 at 4:53 PM

    strolla is going nowhere cos he’s been here so long he’s part of the furniture and because he’s hopeless, fits in well with way we play under our current hopeless manager.
    Hope Gosling stays because he’s never had a decent chance until now and he isn’t a bad player actually.
    One thing is for sure, we will NOT sign more than 3 players so do you REALLY think we will get rid of 14 players?!!? Bad joke Ed.

  • 8 toon kk // Apr 14, 2014 at 4:58 PM

    The wheels came off when Cabaye was sold and not replaced, any other half well run club knows you can’t do that without consequences, only greedy Mash is capable.

    I honestly think Mashley gets a kick out of being a c##t.

  • 9 Toon Tang // Apr 14, 2014 at 5:16 PM

    BandB slot 2, sounds about right

  • 10 theartfuldodger // Apr 14, 2014 at 5:19 PM


    We will be fighting relegation in Jan with that squad and setup.

    Im not suggesting that yr squad wont happen(it very well could) but if it does then that’s us done.

  • 11 mindshaft // Apr 14, 2014 at 5:23 PM

    It’s more likely pards will get rid of all flair players, replace them with hardworking rough and tumble types that will fit his tactics and we’ll be the new stoke

  • 12 toon kk // Apr 14, 2014 at 5:25 PM

    Without very good investment in our squad and a shake up within the club, next season will be our last in the premier league.
    Perhaps it would be for the best if we went down may teach Mash a lesson.

  • 13 mindshaft // Apr 14, 2014 at 5:27 PM

    Interesting thing about Saturday was that pards clearly didn’t want to play HBA and gave into fan / press demands by putting both HBA and Arma on – sadly for him he forgot their actual positions and told Arma to play RW whilst telling HBA just win us the game or your sacked
    Unfortunately HBA got injured after about 2 mins

  • 14 mindshaft // Apr 14, 2014 at 5:28 PM

    I really don’t want to see relegation with what we’ll have in the squad next year or we’ll go into free fall – this lot are def not up for a fight under pardew

  • 15 BandB // Apr 14, 2014 at 5:29 PM

    I’m not saying what I hope will happen. I am saying what I think will happen. I expect Gosling to be a regular next season. He fits the bill for Pardew, who has already saved his career with us. Many of the others have their future as top flight players tied up in Pardew’s survival. It is no wonder they are loyal. I think Ben Arfa, Debuchy and Coloccini are certain to go. And we will accept bids for Cisse and Krul (who is probably our most saleable player).
    All of these players have been targeted by the fans, the manager, or both, at some stage of the season. The only other caveat is that I think a £15 million spend is on the hopeful side. I think they will argue that it is a transitional season and set another lower finishing target, which Ashley will consider us well-equipped for. Pardew would be sure that he could achieve that with these players.

  • 16 Ketsbaia9 // Apr 14, 2014 at 5:29 PM

    Abeid is our future and is a direct replacement for Cabaye. I still think that we need to sign Cabella, Grenier and Adam Johnson. We also need to sign Alderweireld, a big centre half and 3/4 strikers.

  • 17 TurkishFan101 // Apr 14, 2014 at 5:31 PM

    @Mister Tuff

    At least someone recognised what I posted and replied about the subject.

    I am shocked that a no-body GK is having talks about Ben Arfa in that manner, and sucking up to Pardew. Well he should because without Pardew he would be nowhere near NUFC yet enough not even the 1st team!

    But due to Pardew’s stupid connections and believing he is a good enough backup keeper for us, he is here, so he is doing his best off to suck him off so he doesnt get dropped in future or something.

    Then he carries on to talk about us fans like that, like he knows what being a NUFC fan is like, and having the black & white blood run straight through our vains.

    The stupid and most despicable comments about Keegan and supposedly saying Ben Arfa is at fault for the games we lose.

    Get this mug out along with Pardew, I hope he rots in the reserves or we cancel his contract.

    Mind you, hes doing his best for being a puppet of a puppet master. He is trying to big up Pardew so he gets the number 1 spot when Krul leaves to Italy.

    Well It looks like actually that Pardew has promised him a number 1 spot when he leaves.

    God I hope this stupid cockney scum gets sacked and we cancel this waste of a deluded c u nt with him!!

  • 18 Ketsbaia9 // Apr 14, 2014 at 5:34 PM

    I’d take Steven Fletcher and Adam Johnson from Sunderland.

  • 19 jesperfuglsang - captain of the lemon crew // Apr 14, 2014 at 5:34 PM

    What a drag this club is! There went my respect for Elliott out the window ;)

  • 20 banjax // Apr 14, 2014 at 5:35 PM

    The outlook for the supporters of the Toon is grim. Thanks to the actions of Pardew, the reputation of the club around the world is in the toilet and alongside the action of Mike Ashley who sells our best player(s) without a replacement, refuses to invest in a quality squad, refuses to communicate to the supporters and alienates the local press by banning them. As far as I’m concerned our beloved club will struggle under the current owner and manager and I cannot see any self respecting quality manager as well as any decent quality players wanting to come to the club.

  • 21 TurkishFan101 // Apr 14, 2014 at 5:36 PM

    I want you lot to read this article and tell me, if there is anymore Pardew lovers out there, come out forward and explain because at this point you are no longer a nufc fan.

  • 22 jesperfuglsang - captain of the lemon crew // Apr 14, 2014 at 5:36 PM

    Is Benny injured?

  • 23 jesperfuglsang - captain of the lemon crew // Apr 14, 2014 at 5:37 PM

    Turkish…I think one link is enough don’t you agree? ;)

  • 24 TurkishFan101 // Apr 14, 2014 at 5:39 PM


    I posted this moments after it was published here

    So, more than one link is enough don’t you agree :) ?

  • 25 BandB // Apr 14, 2014 at 5:40 PM


    Your post doesn’t surprise me in the least. Tales have been told outside the dressing room for weeks now. Some of them by Pardew. They mainly revolve around players having a go at Hatem Ben Arfa. I don’t think it would take a genius to work out who these players might be. I certainly wasn’t surprised to find Rob Elliot among their number.

  • 26 jesperfuglsang - captain of the lemon crew // Apr 14, 2014 at 5:41 PM

    Turkish…well then we have plenty of links I suppose ;)

  • 27 Bambams // Apr 14, 2014 at 5:43 PM

    That conversation with Elliott !!!!! The Mag.

    If this is accurate what chance have we got. We all knew to be honest but that just puts the icing on the cake.

    Oh Sir Bobby….. What has happened to your club.

    Really need to think hard about my love of going to the games.

  • 28 Geremi's Prosthetic Leg Fund // Apr 14, 2014 at 5:43 PM

    I am also of the belief that should Pardew stay, and be given more of a transfer license, we will emulate the old Stoke side.

    I can envisage plenty of endeavour and hard work, but ultimately no flair or speed. That for any Newcastle fan would be a nightmare. We’ve seen for 3 years now that Pardew struggles with flair players and our chance creation has been down to 3 players this season in Cabaye, Sissoko and Remy. To entrust the way we play and perform to just 3 players is criminal and poor management, especially when one has left and the other is about to.

    Unfortunately for him, Pardew seems to have split the dressing room and is rapidly losing the fans. He’s already lost the media. He’s also proved that without his best 11, he cannot perform. Which at Newcastle United, is just unsustainable considering our injury record and lack of transfers.

    I don’t particularly want to see Pardew go, however I feel he has to at this stage. Too much damage has been done at this point and the seeds of mistrust and apathy have been sewn. When it gets to the point that no fan believes a word you say, regardless of whether or not it is honest or true, you’re a dead man walking.

    I would have thought it in Ashley’s interest to remove Pardew in order to relieve the bubbling pressure on the club as a whole. That way he can at least portray an illusion that the club is in a new era/fresh start etc and buy himself some time. The club must realise that should this acidic situation continue and be allowed to get out of hand (media coverage is becoming more widespread/ fans seen on international tv calling for Pardew’s head etc) then it will undoubtedly have an impact on the reputation of the club in the eyes of potential signings.

    If the club can not bring in the cheap imports any more and we have a window like the last couple, then Ashley is facing a serious dilemma. Does he pay the going rate for players who are known quantities and can keep us at least where we are? and will they want to come? Or does he bring in what he can for as little as he can, most likely them not being good enough, and risk another serious relegation battle and yet more conflict and pressure from fans?

    It is imperative the correct choice has to be made here. In my eyes I can’t see going any other way than Pardew being pushed. The situation could become too volatile and the relationship with fans and local media irreparable.

    Unfortunately for Pardew

  • 29 mindshaft // Apr 14, 2014 at 5:43 PM

    Interesting comments from Elliott – just goes to show he knows his level and is happy to pick up his wages hanging round mid table – if a player has no ambition to better himself and at least try to get an international cap we should get rid
    A manager and owner with no ambition is one thing, if the players themselves expect to be beaten by anyone in top half and happy just beating the odd team here and there we are doomed

  • 30 GeordieTwo // Apr 14, 2014 at 5:44 PM

    10 losses, 4 wins and a draw in the league since Jan. 1. 9 goals for (4 against 9 man Stoke) and 28 against since Jan. 1. Look at those numbers Pardew. :evil:

  • 31 Toon Tang // Apr 14, 2014 at 5:44 PM

    It will be the exact same senario as last season. Summer window with more outgoings than incomings and then if, and only if, we are struggling around crimbo time, panic buy some cheap french lads to hopefully drag us back from oblivion.

    All this without cabs and a 20+ goal a season striker

  • 32 mindshaft // Apr 14, 2014 at 5:46 PM

    That is actually boiling my p1ss – I’ve heard about fibre but I’ve still got this 33k modem and it does the job so you should be happy with that as well

  • 33 mindshaft // Apr 14, 2014 at 5:47 PM

    Guess Elliot’s gonna get some stick next time he appears

  • 34 jesperfuglsang - captain of the lemon crew // Apr 14, 2014 at 5:47 PM

    It is called indoctrination; it is the idea that a person or a group of people are expected not to question or critically examine the doctrine they have learned – in this case from Pardew and the doctrine is that Benny is to blame for the mess we are in.

  • 35 jesperfuglsang - captain of the lemon crew // Apr 14, 2014 at 5:49 PM

    I’ll ask again – is Benny injured?

  • 36 mindshaft // Apr 14, 2014 at 5:49 PM

    Think Elliot’s forgetting who ultimately pays his wages

  • 37 mindshaft // Apr 14, 2014 at 5:50 PM

    Benny was injured about 2 mins after he came on, we couldn’t sub him as we’d used up all our subs so he just hobbled round for 17 mins

  • 38 GeordieTwo // Apr 14, 2014 at 5:51 PM

    Greetings to all my mates out there. Welcome to Blog End, home of your very own Official Blog Hobbit. What is on tap for today you ask? Well all sorts I would say. So put your hairy feet up and join in everyone. We have much to discuss. How to punish various members of the Newcastle United management? Is there a better name for our beloved owner than Mike NoNuts? How bad is Pardew as a manager? Are any of the coaches worth keeping? Has a cure for nutticus shrivelous been developed yet? All this and more. Please stay tuned. :lol:

  • 39 StuW // Apr 14, 2014 at 5:51 PM

    Simple as this….We need to rebuild from scratch more or less. We have two or three players worth keeping(Krul, Debuchy, Sissoko), plus maybe a handful for squad filling(Gosling, Anita[who is being played well out of position, he is a deep midfielder], Abeid[who I think could be a handy midfielder], Williamson.

    Barring that, I wouldn’t be unhappy to see any of the others leave at all. Obviously Benny is capable of the impossible, but only when he can be bothered, and when he can’t be, he is useless. Mbiwa shows glimpses of a good defender, but lapses far too often for my liking.

    But, who is going to buy our squad of flops? Clubs just promoted maybe looking, or a move abroad to a average league team. Jonas won’t fetch £3.5m, Cisse should have been sold in January, as that was the best price we will get for him.

    How much do you think we are going to make in player sales? Next to f*** all.

    I hope(not expect) we do actually do something this summer, because otherwise we will be joining our neighbours in the Championship the season after…

  • 40 GeordieTwo // Apr 14, 2014 at 5:52 PM

    No, Benny is fat jesper mate! It’s the delicious meat pies in the tea room. Beautiful.

  • 41 hadthetshirt // Apr 14, 2014 at 5:52 PM

    The tide is turning.However we wont get rid of pardwho or 23.Ashley goes out of his way to annoy fans.
    Stopped the singing end so he didn’t hear the abuse he got.Changed the name of our stadium (I know it’s changed back now).The only way things will change is if it hits him in the pocket.
    I wonder if Colo is dropped for having a go at him in dressing room (if true) nice to see the local papers respond as they did to pardwho.

  • 42 jesperfuglsang - captain of the lemon crew // Apr 14, 2014 at 5:55 PM

    haha…it will be so funny if he cannot play for the rest of the season!

    …good luck Elliott and Parsnip ;)

  • 43 GeordieTwo // Apr 14, 2014 at 5:56 PM

    Or possibly Benny is pregnant jesper! :shock:

  • 44 Mister Tuff // Apr 14, 2014 at 5:58 PM

    Turkish – I cannot disagree with any of your comments. Really Elliot perhaps should have kept his mouth shut – however his comments were most interesting about Percy doing the best he can if difficult circumstances – plus and a big plus -the comment about Toon fans thinking we should be in the PL. This last comment perhaps illustrates the bunker mentality of us and them – where they appears to be an attitude of the fans versus Newcastle United. This unhealthy and erroneous belief in what we expect could go some way to explain all sorts of things -boarding up the training ground, banning flags and posters, banning the press, farcical control over the Fans Forum etc etc. Throw on top of this the fact that Percy should never have been appointed in the first place (he might be trying his best but he’s not good enough)- selling players without replacements, failing to understand they are not flogging tat but are in the entertainment industry, having a five year plan that has gone belly up, a dubious argument about how to run a modern day football club -on the cheap -and neglecting the progress of the younger players -(the succession of younger players upwards was a key part of the el cheapo plan. Throw on top of that al the shenanigans, JFK, Remy being waylaid by Dirty Harry in London, Percy’s excuses, Percy headbutting etc etc etc.
    We are really in the claggy on a downward spiral.

  • 45 jesperfuglsang - captain of the lemon crew // Apr 14, 2014 at 5:58 PM

    GT…either way good luck to Elliott and Parsnip! ;)

    Question: What kind of vegetable shall be call Elliott?

  • 46 jesperfuglsang - captain of the lemon crew // Apr 14, 2014 at 6:00 PM

    I think I’ll call him Rob “Rhubarb” Elliott :D

  • 47 Jail for Ashley // Apr 14, 2014 at 6:00 PM

    Just reading the reaction to Elliotts comments in a club, when I asked Sissokho in the airport a couple of weeks ago if he’d be here next season, he laughed before saying ‘yeah’, surely a more professional response would to have been puzzled by my question and then to have answered ‘of course’.

  • 48 jesperfuglsang - captain of the lemon crew // Apr 14, 2014 at 6:02 PM

    Senor Tuff… so what you are saying is that Toon fans should not be thinking we should be in the PL? ;)

  • 49 Thump // Apr 14, 2014 at 6:03 PM

    What’s this about Colo and Ben Arfa kicking off in the dressing room? I don’t think Ed’s posted about that, has he?

  • 50 Jail for Ashley // Apr 14, 2014 at 6:03 PM

    Poyet sacked according to mackems on FB, anybody heard ?

  • 51 StuW // Apr 14, 2014 at 6:03 PM

    Here are some of the rumours in and out I have seen in the past few days;

    Remy Cabella
    Joel Campbell
    Alex Lacazette
    Serge Aurier
    Majeed Waris
    Jack Colback
    Ayoze Perez
    Gaston Sauro
    Romelu Lukaku
    Ezequiel Lavezzi
    Clement Grenier
    Yoann Gourcuff
    Danny Ings

    Tim Krul
    Hatem Ben Arfa
    Mathieu Debuchy
    Mapou Yanga-Mbiwa
    Papiss Cisse
    Davide Santon
    Fabricio Coloccini
    Steven Taylor
    Moussa Sissoko

  • 52 Toon Tang // Apr 14, 2014 at 6:04 PM

    What do we reckon Pards would do with Garth Crooks ‘team of the week’ ?

  • 53 Rotonda heights // Apr 14, 2014 at 6:05 PM

    i really dread to think what type of players will come in if pardew is still here next season.

    Are we really so badly off for squad numbers when you consider we have gutierrez out on loan.

    We have a group of technically good players who have been totally pardewed.

    In that 6 match spell when we successfully played 433 a couple of seasons ago we could have just replaced Ba out left with Remy and kept Ben arfa, Cisse and Remy in a potent front 3. This has never even been attempted but Cisse and Ben Arfa haven’t become useless overnight, just demotivated.

    Now our players look at 40% capacity and lost.

  • 54 Graeme // Apr 14, 2014 at 6:05 PM

    At the end of the day, its up to Pardew to maximise the ability of his squad to get the very best out of EVERY one of them. If he, or his coaches are unable to do that then either the Tactics are wrong, the coaching is wrong or the player is wrong.

    Whichever it is – and they have had 3 years to find out – they have done absolutely nothing to resolve the problem. That is the Managers fault, without doubt, its a failure to Manage, which is what he is there for – allegedly!!

  • 55 StuW // Apr 14, 2014 at 6:05 PM

    Would love to see some of the younger lads given more game time next season. Armstrong I think is still a season or two away from the team. Campbell, Dummet, Abeid, Jak Alnwick(apparently looks a decent GK), Remie Streete amongst others.

  • 56 GeordieTwo // Apr 14, 2014 at 6:05 PM

    If Benny is pregnant I think we should be looking to Pardew for some answers! Harrumph!

  • 57 BandB // Apr 14, 2014 at 6:06 PM


    You know that scenario when the pub landlord has to rely on a little clique to keep control in his pub? Or when a teacher needs to rely on a favoured few in his class to keep order? I think that’s just about we are. Discipline appears to be breaking down, and it is coming from the top.

  • 58 toon kk // Apr 14, 2014 at 6:09 PM

    Pardew always said the kids were our future, next season they will be our present with a clear out and the addition of 3 player’s.
    More hoofball with pards, I can hardly wait.!!!

  • 59 Himanshu Dhingra // Apr 14, 2014 at 6:11 PM

    Why shouldn’t toon fans want to be UCL?

    They have been there more times than Spurs. They have seen spurs spend money within their means and overtake Us. Where as at NUFC we feed an owner who couldn’t care less if the club tomorrow ceased to exist.

    Everton? Why not us.

    If you pay peanuts you get monkeys. applies to players and Coaches. Giving up will not help at all.

    It may not happen but every fan has the right to expect and dream.

  • 60 Mister Tuff // Apr 14, 2014 at 6:12 PM

    jesper – no -I’m saying that whilst we would all like to have a team capable of qualifying for the CL (I know not much hope of that) most fans do not think we have a devine right to be there every season -which is contrary to what Elliot suggested. If he really thinks that well -he clearly does not know what most fans want.
    Is Elliot espousing his own views -or is what he said a belief of the manager and or the players or the owner -it is clearly an erroneous view (in my opinion) and demonstrates a divide between the fans and the club.

  • 61 jesperfuglsang - captain of the lemon crew // Apr 14, 2014 at 6:15 PM

    Senor Tuff…look through your post again in the fourth line from the top ;)

  • 62 Thump // Apr 14, 2014 at 6:23 PM

    @Jail: I’ve heard it as well. Not from fans but a mate who’s “itk”. I hope it’s wrong, mind. Getting rid of Poyet would be ridiculous.

  • 63 Mister Tuff // Apr 14, 2014 at 6:23 PM

    jesper – aha – now spotted what you meant. I meant CL as opposed to PL. A lesson learnt to check things before posting. Thank you for pointing out my error.

  • 64 ToonMatt // Apr 14, 2014 at 6:24 PM

    I’m dreading next season, I can see a lot of players going and with no money available for new ones we must be the favorites to go down, I can see us getting battered every week but Ashley will be rubbing his hands together with the 50,000 mugs that line his pockets every season.

  • 65 theartfuldodger // Apr 14, 2014 at 6:25 PM

    Regd the Elliot interview.

    I dont think we shd publish private talk with players. They will hate the fans and not speak any more.

    However the interview is a disturbing read.
    Its like players have been brainwashed that theyr good only for 8th or 9th(or taught to lie)

    Anyways Mr. Elliot 8th or 9th next season would be a good achievment.
    Sadly it will be 18th or 19th.

  • 66 jesperfuglsang - captain of the lemon crew // Apr 14, 2014 at 6:27 PM

    Senor Tuff…it was only tongue in cheek (I knew what you meant) ;)

  • 67 toonarmydownsouth // Apr 14, 2014 at 6:30 PM

    Did people really find the article in the mag that interesting?

    A bloke walks over to a player in a club basically says you’s are playing sh1te and starts digging for the inside scoop then seems surprised to be shot down?

    Who gives a f**k what Rob Elliot has said on a night out, it’s no different to many players have said
    How does someone hassling a player on a night address the issues on the pitch?
    Or has this become the key turning point for the Toon Army?
    Forget banners and protests, we’ll stand around clucking like old hens with a bit of he said she said!

  • 68 toonarmydownsouth // Apr 14, 2014 at 6:32 PM

    No idea about HBA but Colo apparently went absolutely tribal on the rest of the players

  • 69 Thump // Apr 14, 2014 at 6:34 PM

    @tads: Honestly, the most worrying thing is that the wording from Elliot seems to imply that there’s clique’s in the dressing room again. If it’s true, it answers exactly why Ben Arfa hasn’t been picked/has been under performing – the lad has been pushed out by players who were brought in as fringers (Elliot)!

    Take it all with a pinch of salt, but the subtext might actually tell us a lot of what’s going on in the dressing room.

    The other thing is Rob Elliot is widely known as a decent bloke. That interview seems like he was very stand offish (can’t blame him, mind) and, truthfully, makes him sound a bit daft… which definitely isn’t true, at least not to the point where he would get NUFC and Charlton mixed up, anyway.

  • 70 Jail for Ashley // Apr 14, 2014 at 6:34 PM

    There are lots of different factors toward our demise this season, some we know about, some we can take an educated guess at and some that are kept totally in house, what is apparent though is that the towel was firmly thrown in when the players realised that they wouldn’t be allowed to finish higher than eighth.

  • 71 Thump // Apr 14, 2014 at 6:34 PM

    @tads (again): Really? When was this? After Stoke?

  • 72 jesperfuglsang - captain of the lemon crew // Apr 14, 2014 at 6:37 PM

    It is called indoctrination; it is the idea that a person or a group of people are expected not to question or critically examine the doctrine they have learned – in this case from Pardew and the doctrine is that Benny is to blame for the mess we are in.

  • 73 validator // Apr 14, 2014 at 6:39 PM

    The whole affair is verging on the ridiculous, Mr Pardew should have his cards issued along with a up to date railway time table for trains heading south.

  • 74 toonarmydownsouth // Apr 14, 2014 at 6:41 PM

    Maybe but tbh just read it as the club have prob told the players that when they are out and about, they’ll prob get a bit if stick but also remember we have a media ban so stay professional, tow the line etc, this lad sounds like he kept rabbiting on, fair enough he’s a fan and annoyed id prob do the same, but he’s prob kept badgering him over what sounds like “why doesn’t Benny play more,whhhhhyyyyyy” and got told basically why and to then kindly f**k off, I’m not at work and don’t want to talk shop!
    And yeah after stoke, colo blew his lid according to reports, pinch of salt maybe!

  • 75 toonarmydownsouth // Apr 14, 2014 at 6:43 PM

    Has anyone actually blamed HBA directly for the season?
    Personally think there all to blame, Pardew should of had his P45 after losing 11 out of 16 and the players are currently a disgrace to the shirt, all of them

  • 76 welshgeordie9 // Apr 14, 2014 at 6:45 PM

    Good evening ladies what are we bitching about today

  • 77 Mister Tuff // Apr 14, 2014 at 6:45 PM

    tads – I found the Elliot “interview” interesting – information from any player is worth listening to and then the person who receives the information can evaluate what was said/ put it into the melting pot for consideration.

  • 78 BandB // Apr 14, 2014 at 6:45 PM


    I always have my feelers out for what is coming up. I am still working my way ahead in my mind. It is several months since I concluded that Newcastle United was simply being absorbed into Sports Direct. It is several weeks since I satisfied myself that regarding Pardew as a hostage to Ashley was a false analysis that only helps them both. The facts have always been in front of us. We have just refused again and again to believe they were true. But still it is largely the Ashley partizans against the Pardew partizans. Stupid and depressing. As I said yesterday…it is the Alcoholics lecturing the smokers on the need to mend their habits.

  • 79 welshgeordie9 // Apr 14, 2014 at 6:47 PM

    Big match this weekend against swans, could it be pardew last match in charge

  • 80 mag // Apr 14, 2014 at 6:48 PM

    Colocini is one of the main problems at the club after the managerial balls up.

  • 81 Rotonda heights // Apr 14, 2014 at 6:49 PM


    can only hope

  • 82 toonarmydownsouth // Apr 14, 2014 at 6:49 PM

    Mister Tuff
    Fair enough
    Personally think it’s impossible to gauge a conversation by a report, it’s written from his view, we have no idea of the context in which the answers were given or the tone they were asked
    Did a lot of work for Alain Goma a while back and he loved playing in front of 52,000 but hated going out as every time someone asked him something it was put into print, out of context and in the end turned a few members of the dressing room against him to the point he left

  • 83 Ketsbaia9 // Apr 14, 2014 at 6:50 PM

    I think Gaston Ramirez would be a steal.

  • 84 welshgeordie9 // Apr 14, 2014 at 6:51 PM

    Eight players to leave in the summer, yeah right and the rest, how about the whole squad, manager, owner and the next door neighbours cat.

  • 85 mag // Apr 14, 2014 at 6:52 PM

    Pardew out! Another example of his strategic planning on Saturday, three central defenders all of them terrible and should be playing at a lower level like the management.

  • 86 Rotonda heights // Apr 14, 2014 at 6:56 PM


    I think Ashley and Pardew have merged in to one classless dispicable oaf and little despot !

    I used to excuse Ashley on the basis that I thought we had an ok squad that was seriously underachieving under Pardew’s tutelage and archaic tactics.

    However, Ashley sanctioned JFK, Pardew and Wonga, so has well and truly revealed his own odious and morally bankcrupt persona.

    ”Nouveau riche” defines Ashley and Pardew. Money but absolutely zero class.

  • 87 Tsunki // Apr 14, 2014 at 6:57 PM

    If there have been inside criticisms of Alan ‘pardewing’ some of our more technical players then good, needs to be said because that is unfortunately the truth, yes I know it’s been said to death. But just remember, while he is running the team, it doesn’t matter who we buy, he will ruin them with his clueless positioning and formations.

    The nightmare is indeed true, we are stuck with Ashley and NUFC is his clothes horse but he can’t afford a manager who not only loses games an awful lot but also devalues his player investments. Mike, NOW is perfect timing for a new manager, any one really, Curbs, Dowie…just surprise us :)

  • 88 mag // Apr 14, 2014 at 6:58 PM

    Mourinho and Rodgers attended the same coaching sessions as plodder was he skiving or just the class dunce?

  • 89 jesperfuglsang - captain of the lemon crew // Apr 14, 2014 at 6:59 PM

    tads…I think they are all to blame as well, but going from various sources, interviews and so on there seem to be a concensus among some that Benny is more a part of the problem than a solution!

    …and seeing how he has played, been used, been ripped apart this season something suggest (at least to me) there has been taking some sort of indoctrination place at Newcastle?

    Parsnip tries to ricochet everything of him on to someone else and is expecting certain players not to question or critically examine what he says (probably players who are benefiting from this among others)

  • 90 North Atlantic Magpie // Apr 14, 2014 at 6:59 PM

    Alan Pardew will not be our manager come August! That’s for sure!

  • 91 Mister Tuff // Apr 14, 2014 at 7:03 PM

    tads – that is the price of fame I’m afraid. Lots of well known folk will probably get sick of being accosted by anybody – be they fans/supporters/ordinary members of the public. It goes with the territory.
    The way to avoid any possible trouble is to either say nothing or strictly speak “the party line” thus allowing no means of misinterpreting the conversation. Elliot should know that.

  • 92 GeordieTwo // Apr 14, 2014 at 7:06 PM

    Sorry, had to pop off for a bit. I see I’ve missed some excellent blogging. We’re in the trenches, down and dirty now. Beautiful. For my part I feel it’s a little unfair to go at Elliot in the dressing room. He has played well for us when he’s had to come in and I’m sure he wasn’t prepared for the kind of questions and pressure he was getting. Many of us wouldn’t have done any better. It’s natural to get defensive in a situation like that.

  • 93 GeordieTwo // Apr 14, 2014 at 7:07 PM

    I would love to be able to have a crack at Mike however. In front of cameras. But he’s too gutless for that. Let Pardew take all the heat right Mike? An owner who’s a gutless creep. Brilliant. :evil:

  • 94 guvnor // Apr 14, 2014 at 7:07 PM

    Teflon Al has to go after his delirious attack on the papers the mans lost it.

  • 95 Tsunki // Apr 14, 2014 at 7:09 PM

    Lets,face it, we have all been convinced at one time of another that what was once a very skilled player has gradually decided to show their true colours and regress, then we got the comments that they did have flaws before we bought them. Then we get comments from those ‘in the know’ at their former clubs that they didn’t rate them back then anyway – in fact they were rubbish, why did we buy them etc etc…

    Mbiwa, Ben Arfa, Coloccini, Sissoko, Cisse, I could go on – were these useless players to start with, or has something happened to them in their time at NUFC?

    Don’t believe the rubbish.

  • 96 Big Pappa Cissé // Apr 14, 2014 at 7:10 PM

    While some clubs have players working with psychologists that make them believe they can be the best, we have Pardew brainwashing players into thinking 10th is the best we can get and defending is priority . Which is funny because we get turned over every week .

    Also apparently HBA blasted Pardew for ruining (Pardewing) Marveaux & M’biwa which is spot on and if true it just makes me love Benny even more .

    If all of our players are back for Swansea I would like to see us go back to 4-3-3 :





    But what do I know ? . I’m just a mug .

  • 97 toonarmydownsouth // Apr 14, 2014 at 7:12 PM

    Mister Tuff
    Which is exactly what i said, it fully sounded like he was towing the line, but if someone keeps pestering you then some people will continue to get blunter, especially if it’s the same shallow boring line of dull questioning, blah blah Pardew this blah blah Benny that
    There’s more to NUFC than them two, in fact neither of them seem to do f**k all yet seem to be the only topic of any questioning!

    Why not take the opportunity to get a proper insight into the club rather than coming across as a red top wannabe digging for a bit of gossip?

  • 98 GeordieTwo // Apr 14, 2014 at 7:14 PM

    Here at Blog End I hear a lot of harsh criticism of Mike NoNuts. But is it harsh enough lads? Let’s take a moment and ask ourselves that question now……..Is everybody asking themselves? I hope so. Because so far I don’t think NoNuts is getting it. You know, that we really don’t like him? That we’re sick of his odious bile? It’s just a thought. Harrumph!

  • 99 welshgeordie9 // Apr 14, 2014 at 7:14 PM

    I think bony will cause a lot of problems at the weekend

  • 100 guvnor // Apr 14, 2014 at 7:14 PM

    It won’t have anything to do with Pardews schizophrenic team formations and lack of strategic planning, horses for courses doesn’t seem to occur to old Pardew.

  • 101 welshgeordie9 // Apr 14, 2014 at 7:15 PM

    Wake me up when this season ends

  • 102 jesperfuglsang - captain of the lemon crew // Apr 14, 2014 at 7:15 PM

    Can anyone confirm whether or not Benny will be out the next game or so?

  • 103 BandB // Apr 14, 2014 at 7:16 PM


    I think it is strange that while many have crossed the divide straight from being full-on loyalists to being fairly robust sceptics, there are still those fannying about blaming Ashley and defending Pardew, and vice-versa.
    I’m a bit sick of this special pleading.
    Give me the Martoons, the Slanks, the Manxpies anyday.

  • 104 welshgeordie9 // Apr 14, 2014 at 7:17 PM

    See what a I did there with a green day song

    God I’m so talented

  • 105 jesperfuglsang - captain of the lemon crew // Apr 14, 2014 at 7:17 PM

    BandB…they are all to blame for different thing…players as well!

  • 106 jesperfuglsang - captain of the lemon crew // Apr 14, 2014 at 7:18 PM

    …and you can keep manx ;)

  • 107 GeordieTwo // Apr 14, 2014 at 7:19 PM

    I would think it is impossible to get a proper insight into the club with NoNuts in charge tads mate. You know what happens. He has a bunker mentality. Everyone is out to get him for no good reason. Did people see how our spending rated for the last two windows on transfers. In a completely equal world each of the 20 Prem clubs would spend 5% of the total transfer costs. That won’t happen because there are rich and poor clubs. But guess what we spent? About 0.26% of the total! Unbelievable when you look at the club income. And a recipe for disaster as usual. The owner is criminally incompetent in the football world. He is destroying the club. Speak out against him and don’t go to games.

  • 108 BandB // Apr 14, 2014 at 7:20 PM

    I’ve got him here now…tied up with his three little legs kicking.

  • 109 jesperfuglsang - captain of the lemon crew // Apr 14, 2014 at 7:22 PM

    Can you keep him there? ;)

  • 110 Average_Contents // Apr 14, 2014 at 7:25 PM


    Anybody seen him!

    Another one that’s been paid off by fatty ;) probably accepted an SD mug and a credit note to the value of £1.99 redeemable at sport’s direct…..sorry meant the NUFC club shop ;) are they not one in the same though?

    Keep a look out guys he’s no doubt floating around the SD stratosphere with his winky in his ear

  • 111 BandB // Apr 14, 2014 at 7:25 PM

    He’ll be in a pie by midnight.
    Just like the rest of them………………

  • 112 guvnor // Apr 14, 2014 at 7:26 PM

    Pardews gotta go! He’s had a good time at the supporters expense and now the party’s over.

  • 113 toonarmydownsouth // Apr 14, 2014 at 7:28 PM

    Oh yeah mate no doubt no one but Jabba the c**t knows his true dastardly schemes for the club
    The point i was ( badly ) trying to make was if presented with a chance like the Elliott one, why not really try and find out just what the hell is going on with the club, is the 5 yr plan actually real etc rather than try to reinact a laundrette scene from Eastenders?

  • 114 GeordieTwo // Apr 14, 2014 at 7:28 PM

    And where is The Spanish Stud Muffin? He should be on here speaking out against injustice and cruelty to supporters by Mr. NoNuts! Harrumph! I’m incensed! I’m outraged! It’s even put me off having a refreshing beverage!

  • 115 bobby mango // Apr 14, 2014 at 7:28 PM

    Completely disenchanted with this piece sh!t club.

  • 116 GeordieTwo // Apr 14, 2014 at 7:29 PM

    Good point tads mate. The questioning of the club is often quite shallow. Not enough decent journo’s really doing their jobs and digging into this mess created by The Nutless One. Harrumph!

  • 117 jesperfuglsang - captain of the lemon crew // Apr 14, 2014 at 7:30 PM

    GT…he was on earlier today when you where still getting your beauty sleep ;)

  • 118 Mister Tuff // Apr 14, 2014 at 7:31 PM

    BandB -please rip of his gimp mask- then a few cracks of your whip should get him into shape. Then progress by untying the rope and substitute a dog collar and lead -accompanied by a few more cracks of your whip.

  • 119 guvnor // Apr 14, 2014 at 7:33 PM

    It wouldn’t be so bad if Pardew actually had a personality to go with his complete lack of knowledge.

  • 120 BandB // Apr 14, 2014 at 7:35 PM

    Mister Tuff!!

    Good grief no!
    I have a pecuniary interest in the meat trade. I am not in search of titillation.
    Please visit my humble abode yourself.
    You’ll never leave.

  • 121 GeordieTwo // Apr 14, 2014 at 7:35 PM

    I’m naturally beautiful even without sleep jesper mate :)! I must insist that the Muffin come back on and give us his in depth analysis of the situation. It’s all well and good hanging out at the beach or admiring your Spanish Man Tassel collection Ibiza mate but we need your input! Harrumph!

  • 122 Average_Contents // Apr 14, 2014 at 7:36 PM

    Mister Tuff

    You seem to have intimate knowledge of the inner workings of our illustrious owner’s weaknesses when it comes to being a “sex slave”

    So please feel free to continue and enlighten us more because it was rather riveting ;)

  • 123 GeordieTwo // Apr 14, 2014 at 7:37 PM

    Not to worry lads and lasses I’ve been in touch with Mike’s dominatrix. I’ve got her on a high protein and exercise regime. Lot’s of pumping iron. The next time she’s over at Mike’s place the workout will be quite strenuous indeed for him! Beautiful!

  • 124 validator // Apr 14, 2014 at 7:40 PM

    Word has it Ashley used to do Ron Jeremys stunt work.

  • 125 BandB // Apr 14, 2014 at 7:40 PM


    Hello, you incorrigible rascal you!
    I think even I could do with a trip to your Burt Reynolds world of wonders tonight. It has been that sort of day.
    And to think I woke up this morning looking forward to making a Pieta out of daffodils.

  • 126 jesperfuglsang - captain of the lemon crew // Apr 14, 2014 at 7:41 PM

    GT…strange he is not even online (he’s usual always online)

    …I am not liking this ;) lol

  • 127 jesperfuglsang - captain of the lemon crew // Apr 14, 2014 at 7:43 PM

    Don’t speak of daffodils (OV will just return I am afraid)

  • 128 GeordieTwo // Apr 14, 2014 at 7:45 PM

    Greetings BandB. Good to see you on here lass. Yes I am mostly incorrigible. I do buff up well after a shower however. Very good of you to bring up Burt Reynolds. Excellent moustache. Good sense of humour. Deliverance was frightening but I can think of a good role for Mike in it. Harrumph!

  • 129 Mister Tuff // Apr 14, 2014 at 7:46 PM

    BandB – apologies – could not resist that post -after you mentioned tying Manx up – I think you innocently set yourself up there.

    Average -I’m afraid my knowledge of such matters as bondage, sex slaves is limited. Why somebody would want to get their bum caned is beyond my comprehension.- a strange world these days.

  • 130 BandB // Apr 14, 2014 at 7:47 PM


    Would you get the Geordie daffodil joke?

    A man walks into a barber’s shop in Ashington and says: “Can I have a perm please?”

    The barber (an Ashington lad) replies: “Errr, erlright. I wandered lernly as a clowed.”

  • 131 validator // Apr 14, 2014 at 7:47 PM

    G2 are you a practising homosexual by any chance?

  • 132 GeordieTwo // Apr 14, 2014 at 7:48 PM

    I don’t know about the rest of you but I’m having a lot of anxiety about the future of the club lately (well it’s been about 7 years now actually). What can be done? Certainly I can sit here in Blog End and complain as Official Blog Hobbit but something more may be needed. We need a cunning plan mates. Hmmmmm.

  • 133 GeordieTwo // Apr 14, 2014 at 7:50 PM

    Nay validator mate. I am a fully accredited heterosexual. And I don’t need to practice. I have great respect for all and sundry but I do prefer the lasses (and a nice refreshing beverage).

  • 134 BandB // Apr 14, 2014 at 7:52 PM


    What sort of question is that, eh!
    Are you a practising bigot by any chance?

  • 135 jesperfuglsang - captain of the lemon crew // Apr 14, 2014 at 7:53 PM

    BandB…”… I wandered lonely as a cloud
    That floats on high o’er vales and hills,
    When all at once I saw a crowd,
    A host, of golden daffodils” ;)

  • 136 GeordieTwo // Apr 14, 2014 at 7:53 PM

    I like your joke BandB. I’m not good at humour myself. It’s strictly seriosity with me all the way. But I do occasionally giggle, snigger and titter. Oh and I have been known to chortle. Beautiful.

  • 137 validator // Apr 14, 2014 at 7:54 PM

    Pardon my probing its just your camp attitude and penchant for moustaches that led me to this conclusion.

  • 138 BandB // Apr 14, 2014 at 7:55 PM


    That is lovely. But I wasn’t testing your Wordsworth. I was testing your familiarity with inherited Scandivavian flat vowels still at play among us of Norse descent.

  • 139 GeordieTwo // Apr 14, 2014 at 7:56 PM

    Jesper I occasionally wander lonely as a cloud. But then the lasses knock me down and run barefoot through my chest hair. It’s quite an experience.

  • 140 validator // Apr 14, 2014 at 7:56 PM

    Bandb I’m sorry you’re so touchy about your problems.

  • 141 GeordieTwo // Apr 14, 2014 at 7:57 PM

    Oh I see validator. Well then that’s all right. Harrumph. I like show tunes as well.

  • 142 GeordieTwo // Apr 14, 2014 at 8:00 PM

    Well mates I haven’t come up with a cunning plan for dealing with Mike yet. But I will work on it! Trust me on this. There can be no respite for The Nutless One. We have to squeeze him whenever possible. Pile on the pressure.

  • 143 catchy in norway // Apr 14, 2014 at 8:00 PM

    let me tell you about the birds and the bees and the flowers in trees and the moon up above , and a thing called love,
    cos when i look into your big brown eyes

  • 144 GeordieTwo // Apr 14, 2014 at 8:01 PM

    I tried to float on high over vales and hills once but my hang glider wasn’t working properly. Very difficult recovery. :(

  • 145 jesperfuglsang - captain of the lemon crew // Apr 14, 2014 at 8:03 PM

    But BandB…I most admit I didn’t really get the joke!

  • 146 jesperfuglsang - captain of the lemon crew // Apr 14, 2014 at 8:05 PM

    …but I suppose it’s all in the word “poem” or in Geordie “perm” ;)

  • 147 BandB // Apr 14, 2014 at 8:07 PM


    Never mind. It does get lost in translation. Even in County Durham. Ibizatoon wouldn’t get it either, and he has an Auntie Bea from Newcastle, apparently. Impressed but not surprised by your Wordsworth.

  • 148 jesperfuglsang - captain of the lemon crew // Apr 14, 2014 at 8:07 PM

    BandB…but speaking of daffodils I thought the “perm” was just fitting ;)

  • 149 GeordieTwo // Apr 14, 2014 at 8:08 PM

    Catchy what are you up to mate? And if you want a real love song you must check out Muskrat Love, the Captain and Toenail version. Beautiful.
    “Muskrat Susie, Muskrat Sam
    Do the jitterbug out in muskrat land
    And they shimmy
    And Sammy’s so skinny
    And they whirled and they twirled and they tangoed
    Singin’ and jingin’ the jango
    Floatin’ like the heavens above
    It looks like muskrat love ”
    I love to jing the jango in Blog End by the way.

  • 150 BandB // Apr 14, 2014 at 8:09 PM

    jesper…it is as simple and as rib-tickling funny to us as that. Sad.

  • 151 Mister Tuff // Apr 14, 2014 at 8:10 PM

    Band B most Geordies would not get that joke -you would have to have knowledge of the “Ashiton” / Bedlington twang.

  • 152 Dannyo // Apr 14, 2014 at 8:10 PM

    Anyone figured out a plausible reason for WHY Pardew opted for a 3-5-2 against Stoke?
    Often you could make some sort of explanation or argue in Pardew’s favour for why he’s done what he’s done. Without actually agreeing that is.
    But 3-5-2 against Stoke baffles me. I don’t get it.

  • 153 GeordieTwo // Apr 14, 2014 at 8:10 PM

    I bet your also impressed by my vast knowledge of Muskrat Love aren’t you BandB? America did it first but I just totally admire The Captain and Toenail version. Huzzah!

  • 154 jesperfuglsang - captain of the lemon crew // Apr 14, 2014 at 8:12 PM

    GT…did you ever see that old Heineken beer TV advertisement?

  • 155 GeordieTwo // Apr 14, 2014 at 8:12 PM

    You know if wor club was in better hands I would jing the jango far more often. It’s nearly as good as having a refreshing beverage.

  • 156 guvnor // Apr 14, 2014 at 8:12 PM

    B and B is the knitting circle closed tonight?

  • 157 guvnor // Apr 14, 2014 at 8:14 PM

    Its supposed to be a football blog and these old women are reciting dodgy poetry.

  • 158 guvnor // Apr 14, 2014 at 8:15 PM

    Pardew used 3 5 2 they were his lottery numbers.

  • 159 jesperfuglsang - captain of the lemon crew // Apr 14, 2014 at 8:16 PM

    Dannyo…when I saw the lineup I thought is was 5-3-2 (mind you I don’t watch the games these day just follow on my phone)

  • 160 jesperfuglsang - captain of the lemon crew // Apr 14, 2014 at 8:17 PM

    GT…I don’t think the blog is ready for “The Captain and Toenails” :(

  • 161 Big Pappa Cissé // Apr 14, 2014 at 8:18 PM

    Pardew probably thought:

    Fackin hell, those Northern Monkeys at Liverpool seem to fretten the goal and they sometimes play 3-5-2 .

    Fack it, lets give it a bosh my san and if it fails I can blame Ben Arfa the cant .

  • 162 guvnor // Apr 14, 2014 at 8:19 PM

    Village People is the way the blogs headed.

  • 163 GeordieTwo // Apr 14, 2014 at 8:19 PM

    I hadn’t seen that commercial before jesper mate. Quite excellent. Guvnor beeehaaaave! This is not dodgy poetry. This is fine poetry and distinguished love song lyrics. There can be no mocking of either with the Official Blog Hobbit in attendance. As for the old 3-5-2 Dannyo mate. That was just an accident. Pards was in the stands waving his arms madly and Carver got the wrong impression. Pards actually wanted a 4-6-0 formation. :shock:

  • 164 guvnor // Apr 14, 2014 at 8:22 PM

    G2 its too much all this leaping around with nothing on reciting poetry.

  • 165 GeordieTwo // Apr 14, 2014 at 8:22 PM

    You know mates I’m sensing a lack of seriosity creeping into the conversation again. Is it going to be like that then?……..Well?…….I’ll be watching you lot! Harrumph!

  • 166 GeordieTwo // Apr 14, 2014 at 8:23 PM

    I have me boxers on guvnor. Everything is under control. The lasses picked me up and dusted me off after cavorting in my chest hair also.

  • 167 guvnor // Apr 14, 2014 at 8:25 PM

    They’ll be issuing white string vests and frankie goes to Hollywood next.

  • 168 GeordieTwo // Apr 14, 2014 at 8:26 PM

    What’s this jesper? Not ready for the Captain and Toenail? One of the finest pop, rock, duos of all time? The Captain with his little hat playing the piano, and the beautiful Toenail singing and looking just…..well….. beautiful. Their version of Muskrat Love is a must listen.

  • 169 GeordieTwo // Apr 14, 2014 at 8:27 PM

    Once you get Muskrat Love stuck in your heed it stays there for months. I’m humming it right now. Beautiful.

  • 170 guvnor // Apr 14, 2014 at 8:27 PM

    Captain and toenail needs to insert it into Pardews anus.

  • 171 BandB // Apr 14, 2014 at 8:32 PM


    I am, from your puerile perspective, an old woman.
    So what?
    I can also knit. For you to acquire such a skill would require taking your hands off your tiddly for few minutes.
    Could I knit you something for bedtime, petal?
    Blab away. Like I will care.
    Pea brain.

  • 172 guvnor // Apr 14, 2014 at 8:33 PM

    G2 try listening to Bach air on a G string or beethoven rousing 5th symphony 1st movement the Mozart effect.

  • 173 guvnor // Apr 14, 2014 at 8:35 PM

    B and B can you put a decent conversation together without running into the passage screaming though?

  • 174 BandB // Apr 14, 2014 at 8:37 PM

    Can you hold my sides there a moment hun.
    I think they just split.
    Sorry, not worth my time.

  • 175 guvnor // Apr 14, 2014 at 8:37 PM

    That’ll be a nope then?

  • 176 Mister Tuff // Apr 14, 2014 at 8:42 PM

    guvnor – the G string is a violin string and not an item of ladies underclothing.

  • 177 GeordieTwo // Apr 14, 2014 at 8:43 PM

    Mates please! Gentle humour is best. Let’s be respectful at all times (the owner is an exception of course). I do like a bit of classical music as well guvnor. BandB is a subtle wit. I like her posts very much. Everybody should have a bit to add without having to disrespect others.

  • 178 guvnor // Apr 14, 2014 at 8:43 PM

    Bravo tuff ! Try listening to Bach.

  • 179 BandB // Apr 14, 2014 at 8:45 PM

    That’s It!
    The Hobbit – There and Bach Again!

  • 180 GeordieTwo // Apr 14, 2014 at 8:46 PM

    If we could all just sing Muskrat Love now please?
    “And now he’s ticklin’ her fancy
    Rubbin’ her toes
    Muzzle to muzzle, now anything goes
    As they wriggle, and Sue starts to giggle
    And they whirled and they twirled and they tangoed
    Singin’ and jingin’ the jango
    Floatin’ like the heavens above
    It looks like muskrat love”
    Now we should all be mellow. Beautiful. In other words “Get Mellow Damnit!!!!” Harrumph.

  • 181 GeordieTwo // Apr 14, 2014 at 8:47 PM

    See what I mean guvnor mate? You have to appreciate some subtle humour as well. I pride myself on robust Hobbit humour but it takes hairy feet to get it right.

  • 182 yo-yo // Apr 14, 2014 at 8:49 PM


    In acerbic mood tonight I see :)
    Love the analysis at post 2 but not sure I agree totally that its an either Pardew or Mash to blame situation. I think they both are but the organ grinder rather than the monkey holds the trump cards. Pardew is undoubtedly supporting and promopting his boss, and I agree not just becaise he fears for his job but he also sees us a mediocre “8th or 9th” and so bleats our second choice keeper – evidently having bought into the propaganda.

  • 183 GeordieTwo // Apr 14, 2014 at 8:50 PM

    Well it seems that a lot of you are now requesting more of my favourite Captain and Toenail tunes. Beautiful. I shall attempt to deliver on this and many other important requests in coming days.
    Your Humble Servant

  • 184 guvnor // Apr 14, 2014 at 8:50 PM

    Granted g2.

  • 185 GeordieTwo // Apr 14, 2014 at 8:54 PM

    And no I’m not completely mad. Ask jesper. Ask The Spanish Stud Muffin. They will vouch for me. Ask Mr. Tuff (well he might be busy videotaping some special dance numbers). Ask Tsunki. They all know how normal I really am. No…..really. :shock:

  • 186 guvnor // Apr 14, 2014 at 8:54 PM

    I’ll leave B and B to his histrionics.

  • 187 GeordieTwo // Apr 14, 2014 at 8:55 PM

    I like that word acerbic by the way. Not as good as tiffin but still….

  • 188 GeordieTwo // Apr 14, 2014 at 8:57 PM

    I know I’m not mad because my mother also had me tested. Harrumph.

  • 189 BandB // Apr 14, 2014 at 8:57 PM

    You know me yo-yo…I hope. I am flying a few kites when I should be working. I am trying to break the circle of blame. I think anything that guarantees safety by the end of March will do. But I have, in my way, always been by far the most extreme opponent of this regime.

  • 190 GeordieTwo // Apr 14, 2014 at 8:59 PM

    If Hull City can be the Tigers could we become Newcastle Wild Stallions? It might terrify the opposition a bit.

  • 191 Mister Tuff // Apr 14, 2014 at 9:00 PM

    guvnor – BandB is a female blogger.

  • 192 BandB // Apr 14, 2014 at 9:00 PM


    Better than tiffin.
    The rudest word in English.

  • 193 BandB // Apr 14, 2014 at 9:02 PM


    No, no, no!
    He was doing so WELL to!

  • 194 GeordieTwo // Apr 14, 2014 at 9:03 PM

    I actually hate getting sand in my crevices BandB. It’s so difficult to look cool at the beach with sand in your crevices. Harrumph.

  • 195 BandB // Apr 14, 2014 at 9:05 PM


    You think!

  • 196 GeordieTwo // Apr 14, 2014 at 9:05 PM

    “Nobody knows the trouble that I’ve seen
    Nobody knows my sorrow
    Nobody knows the trouble that I’ve seen
    With sand in my crevices.”
    So sorrowful, so beautiful in it’s own way. Huzzah!

  • 197 GeordieTwo // Apr 14, 2014 at 9:06 PM

    So you’re agreeing with me on this vital point BandB lass?

  • 198 GeordieTwo // Apr 14, 2014 at 9:07 PM

    You know there are some fairly strange people on here today. Has anybody else noticed? It’s actually quite exciting isn’t it?

  • 199 yo-yo // Apr 14, 2014 at 9:08 PM


    Newcastle Seahorses surely ?

  • 200 BandB // Apr 14, 2014 at 9:10 PM


    The un-lady-like shovelling that goes on behind those discreetly placed towels would make you blanch…lad.
    I think though, the blog, once in need of light relief from a day of misery, might now be ready for some football chatter. Would you like to be my lead, gorgeous?

  • 201 GeordieTwo // Apr 14, 2014 at 9:17 PM

    Why yes I would BandB. I too love to discuss footy. In my opinion the entire club needs a turnover. But it must be done after the owner goes. He hides behind a manager with an 8 year contract. There seems to be no consequences for Pardew’s overall poor behavior, poor tactics and lack of leadership. These players have all played well previously but they look desperately poor now. Blame starts at the top but there is plenty to go down to the lower levels of management and coaching.

  • 202 BandB // Apr 14, 2014 at 9:20 PM


    And what would you say to those who argue that we are ninth in the league…safe from any relegation worries…and comfortably hitting the targets our reserve goalkeeper apparently regards as about our level?

  • 203 GeordieTwo // Apr 14, 2014 at 9:23 PM

    I would say Harrumph! to such people BandB lass. After that I would say take a look at the form chart. Or take a look at our record since Jan. 1. Take a look at what happens without Cabaye or Remy in the lineup. One is gone (with Mike holding the dosh in his hands gleefully) and the other isn’t our player. Take a look at who is going to supposedly fix things in the summer. Then tremble in fear.

  • 204 BandB // Apr 14, 2014 at 9:28 PM

    And I would say G2 …lad…that I have been looking at the form chart. And it says we are not going to be relegated. And Sunderland are!
    Isn’t that, surely, what football has always been all about?
    That, and religiously buying replica shirts for every member of the family not still in calico.
    Like it was back in the olden days.

  • 205 jazzyp // Apr 14, 2014 at 9:30 PM

    Shows how sh@te We are when our mortal enemy have scored more goals than ourselves at Sjp

  • 206 GeordieTwo // Apr 14, 2014 at 9:32 PM

    Thank you for recognizing my ladiness BandB. I’m still very young at heart although my knees don’t believe it anymore sadly. As for not being relegated, no! That’s not what football is all about. It’s about pride in your club, and having a singing section, and enjoying going to games, and having an owner that loves to watch the game and see his team win. It’s about looking forward to every game, and knowing your manager isn’t going to head butt someone, and competing hard in every competition! Harrumph!

  • 207 GeordieTwo // Apr 14, 2014 at 9:42 PM

    Well I had best get back to my chores mates. Always a pleasure. Stay wild and wooly.

previous post: Newcastle In The Driver’s Seat For This Striker

next post: Pardew Must Not Lose Against Swansea On Saturday