We always think it’s a bit funny and even entertaining when a manager reviews a game his team has just lost, and talks about all the ifs and buts, and basically says if other things had happened that they would have won the game, or at least done a lot better – it’s called fiction.
This is a nervous Alan Pardew on the touchline last night
That’s what managers of relegation teams do all the time, and we suppose there’s not much else they can say in the circumstances, given they want to keep their jobs.
We remember way back in the dark ages of 1961 when we were finally relegated to the second division under then manager Charlie Mitten, and we’d be beaten say 3-0 and we’d say two of their goals were offside, the goalkeeper should have saved the other one, and we missed two great chances – we should have won 2-0. 😀
When we look back on what we used to say – it was hilarious – but we meant every single word of it – we think it’s called being delusional.
Newcastle are going through a terrible time of it at the moment and this is some of what the Newcastle manager had to say after the game:
“Coming to Arsenal was tough, especially with Mesut Ozil and Aaron Ramsay coming back to full fitness.” “This is a difficult place to come to anyway.”
“I thought they were very imaginative and caused us a lot of problems.” “But we defended really well in that first period.” “We had a good foot-hold in the game until the first goal.”
“That period just before half-time was costly for us.” “It is difficult to say if it is an improvement.” “Against Swansea we didn’t deserve to lose.”
“They are chasing a Champions League position.” “If we could have scored when Gouffran went through or one of our other chances we could have put some nerves into their game.”
“Once they had a 2-0 lead it was difficult for us.” “I thought we showed tremendous character in the second half.” “It’s a difficult scenario being five defeats in a row and being 2-0 down at this place.”
“At least we showed that in second half.”
You know, if we had only scored more goals than Arsenal we could have even won the game last night.
To be continued after the game against Cardiff City on Saturday ….. and let’s hope Alan is talking then about how we could have won the game by an even bigger margin.
Comments welcome.
87 comments so far
Toon Tang
Apr 29, 2014 at 1:45 PM
Comment #41Did pards really say “If We’d Scored More Goals Than Arsenal – We Could Have Won”
or is that just ed taking the piss like hahahaaaa chuffin hilarious
TurkishFan101
Apr 29, 2014 at 1:48 PM
Comment #42Jail for Ashley
52k or 55k does not matter.
One voice joined with others and whole club can make a difference, just like how even £1 can get a person a loaf a bread that could last a week to feed them.
Fans choose to agree with the way they are treated, not every fan does but the fan base is still split, by this I mean the majority and the minority.
Until fans unite and want to end this nightmare of constant lies and being deceived, nothing will not change, most fans should know this.
But listening to pundits, reading newspapers and random peoples insight of how great Newcastle are doing is how easily people have been tricked.
Remember, The greatest trick the Devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn’t exist.
wolfshead@toon
Apr 29, 2014 at 1:49 PM
Comment #43JFA
im surprised at you being fattys longest running critic an all do you believe he is capable of changing his spots after all these years if anything his cynicism is getting worse like i said before which manager worth his salt would come here deep down i would imagine pards is sick of it all too despite his brave face hes like the players that wont get a big move just sticking sticking it out for the money
Jail for Ashley
Apr 29, 2014 at 1:49 PM
Comment #44Toon Tang,
I watched his interview on that link earlier so knew it was a pi$$ take, but I still had to read the aricle just in case, I think we’ll hear some bizarre waffle if Cardiff turn us over.
Ibizatoon
Apr 29, 2014 at 1:51 PM
Comment #45Jail…Be fair mate, we’re going to hear some bizarre waffle regardless of the Cardiff result.
Lilongwe Geordie
Apr 29, 2014 at 1:51 PM
Comment #46Ian,
We certainly weren’t easy on the eye against Spurs!! We were battered and only a masterclass from Krul saved us. Cardiff we were good first half, awful second. Liverpool was a mainly rearguard action, not easy on the eye. Hull (minus Cabaye btw) we played well, Man U I thought we played well. Chelsea we contained and hit on the break in true Mourinho fashion – not exactly easy on the eye, but spot on in the circumstances.
I missed both Villa and Palace so can’t comment on those.
Of course problems stem from the top, and Ashley is a huge problem, but that does not mean Pardew should be excused for failing to get his players playing at a level they are capable of.
It is also slightly damning that in a season spanning 35 games (not including cups) you have managed to pick out just a handful of games where it could be argued we played well. I gave Pardew credit when we did well, therefore it stands to reason that he also takes some of the flack when it all goes wrong.
Jail for Ashley
Apr 29, 2014 at 1:55 PM
Comment #47Wolfs,
I don’t think he will but Pardew has become completely indefensible for reasons I pointed out in a previous post tbis morning.
Ian Toon
Apr 29, 2014 at 1:56 PM
Comment #48Turkish – So let me geddit. As well as being the owner of NUFC Ashley in his spare time from SD he is the devil incarnate.
TurkishFan101
Apr 29, 2014 at 1:58 PM
Comment #49You don’t get my point at all, if you had read my previous comment you would of known why I have used that statement.
Read again and reply.
stuart no9
Apr 29, 2014 at 1:58 PM
Comment #50ashly must realise , if he dosnt sack pardew , the protests and venim will be directed at him soon .the fans have got to start being more vocal – shout anything , abuse the b”’ds i dont care . Give them what they are giving us . shyte.
Toon Tang
Apr 29, 2014 at 1:59 PM
Comment #51jail, aye ya never know with pards eh, could easily be one of his classics, will be looking forward to hearing his bizarre waffle if we do get run by cardiff though i tells ya.
lochinvar
Apr 29, 2014 at 2:08 PM
Comment #52Martinez is saying that Everton need 6 more players ( of good quality ) on top of their existing squad that gets them there.
So we need another 11 ?
wolfshead@toon
Apr 29, 2014 at 2:11 PM
Comment #53for most the venom is being spewed at fatty but as he is is unassailable its now being directed towards his mouthpiece
Laurent Robert 32
Apr 29, 2014 at 2:11 PM
Comment #54Ian, if you think were easy on the eye in some of those games, then I don’t k ow what type of football you’d be happy with.
We have extremely rarely looked satisfactory in the final third. Teams can a lot of the time let you have the ball in the other two thirds so it’s hardly pleasing on the eye.
We’ve had a number of deflections, solo goals, freekicks, last minute goals to nick points. Even the Cabaye goal against Liverpool was from miles out. No solid team play there.
Pardew has had signings at his other clubs and still broken bad record after bad record. The fact that he wants to get in British journeymen and sloggers will bring it to the only level he knows.
He’s lucky that Carr got in the players he has done under a highly restrictive budget. They have been paper overing his crater-like cracks for years. Fifth included.
It must be torture for flair players to play under his negative and containing football. They are all drained from it. It sucks the life from them.
BandB
Apr 29, 2014 at 2:11 PM
Comment #55Ibizatoon,
Sorry I missed you earlier due to my policy of LIPSSALO (logging on and off)
With regard to the “where we should be” debate, I think the same pundits would also regard a year-long relegation battle next season as “about where we should be.”
And if we carry current form into next season, with a few adjustments to the squad to mirror Pardew’s “vision”, they will be right.
Pardew is unlikely to regard a relegation battle as below our dignity, as that is HIS level, and the one we will again sink to.
It is hard sometimes to recall that most of us until quite recently sat in a stadium where the brand name was “The Entertainers.”
We have undergone Ashleyfication. We carry the old name, but everyone knows we are now a tat brand travesty of those days.
headtheball
I like your analogy. I was thinking it myself earlier. The days when they rail from their bunker that they have been betrayed by the unworthiness of the people may be a couple of years off (we are in 1943 rather than 1945). But it IS the end of the beginning.
Jail for Ashley
Apr 29, 2014 at 2:12 PM
Comment #56Lochinvar,
It will be interesting if that number decreases every mo th until August before releasing a statement saying the squads strong enough.
Laurent Robert 32
Apr 29, 2014 at 2:15 PM
Comment #57As Lilo said, Spurs absolutely battered us. It was appalling. It could have been 7 and nobody would have said otherwise. Most saves in a premier league game I think it was.
Ashley out, Pardew out.
DokToon
Apr 29, 2014 at 2:16 PM
Comment #58pardew’s statements after the cardiff result next saturday:
“if we had just scored one more goal than cardiff, wed have had three points”
“if we had beaten cardiff, it wouldve ended our losing streak, but, alas, it was not to be… the fans are frustrated, im frustrated…. but we will be sgning some talent in the next window, or perhaps the one after that, so we’ll be ok next season”
“im a top manager, no one cares as much, or is as quality as me, so ive got to do a little better… my tactics were sound, but were this close (holds index and thumb a half inch apart) tobeing where we want to be, and thats mid table”
“all in all, weve had a great season, some ups, some downs, but overall, im pleased with what weve accomplished”
Laurent Robert 32
Apr 29, 2014 at 2:17 PM
Comment #59Goal difference of -18. Nice one, Alan. You’re amazing.
Laurent Robert 32
Apr 29, 2014 at 2:18 PM
Comment #60All with no cups hampering us, which he helped to organise us out of. How kind.
Ibizatoon
Apr 29, 2014 at 2:20 PM
Comment #61BandB…No problem, thank you for coming back to me.
So, I get the “LI” and “LO” – Would the “PSSA” mean – Post Some Stuff And?
Not a reflection on your input, just racking my brains and that’s all I came up with. Pretty imaginative, no?
This is for me our biggest issue. No matter the manager, general opinion, whilst not completely accurate, will be that any manager, working under these conditions, will never be expected to achieve anything. The whole design is to coast along.
With that in mind, I really struggle to make too much of a deal about Pardew and his shortcomings – and there are certainly a fair few.
Come on BandB, tell us the way forward. Is there one?
theartfuldodger
Apr 29, 2014 at 2:24 PM
Comment #62Its getting hillarious now..
Media and Press see us based on our table position.
NEXT SEASON WHEN WE ARE IN BOTTOM 5 THEN THEY WILL ALL CALL FOR PARDEWS HEAD…MEDIA PRESS FANS EVERYONE..NO ONE WILL BE SYMPATHETIC…ITS JUST THAT SOME PEOPLE CANT SEE THE PATTERN AND PATH WE ARE HEADED..
WE ARE NOT GOING TO GET ANOTHER CABAYE BA REMY. WE ARE NOT THAT ATTRACTIVE ANYMORE.
Ancientcoptic
Apr 29, 2014 at 2:26 PM
Comment #63The only reason Pardew got 5th is because of a lot of lucky factors.
Ba’s form in the first half of the season.
The back line playing well, they had too as we camped on leads.
Cisse joining in the 2nd half of the season, and being in great form – coming from a better coached side.
The transition and bad form of Chelsea.
Liverpool being all over the place after Dalglish.
Our ability to grab the lead in games, even though we were being dominated by other sides, including teams at the bottom of the table.
I would have no doubts we were the team with the highest premier league position ever, for such a low goal difference. Another indicator of luck & poor football.
All in all, our best season under Pardew is a complete facade.
TheToonKing
Apr 29, 2014 at 2:30 PM
Comment #64what was Pardew watching ? we we’re totally absent, training game for Arsenal. didn’t have a snowball’s chance in hell.
Wayayman
Apr 29, 2014 at 2:32 PM
Comment #65Just a quick point for anyone who thinks Pardews is compromised because of Ashley’s lack of investing. Well, he is to a point (not replacing Cabaye obvs) but then answer me this:
How did Man U have such a mare of a season this time round with virtually the same squad as the last 4 years? Some would say an improved squa, we’d snap up anyone they bought in the last two windows.
Cardiff under Solskjaer?
What about how well Everton are playing this season?
Palace’s form since Christmas?
NEVER underestimate the effect a good manager can have on his team, and the effect a sh!te one can have too.
I have no doubt that someone like Martinez would have had US playing like Everton have this season, and Cabaye might even have been tempted to stay.
The HUGE worry about keeping Pardew is that Krul, Debuchy, Remy, Cisse (I think he’s quality but been Pardewed), Ben Arfa, Yanga Mbiwa, all will probably up and leave in the summer.
Most of them would stay if we appointed someone with vision and technical knowledge -that’s the crying shame.
BandB
Apr 29, 2014 at 2:36 PM
Comment #66Ibizatoon
Log in, post some sh&t and log off. My mission statement.
It goes way back to those happy days when we walked together in pastures green by still waters.
I have always tried to puzzle ahead, trying to pick a path from throwaway phrases and weird gaps in the narrative.
But apart from to say that I think we ain’t seen nothing yet, I can’t guess where it is going. I think it will probably end in a bunker.
We had a good run which lasted around 10 years. I won’t accept the argument that our default position is fair to middling. As I see it, the club underachieved in the seventies and eighties, rather than over-achieved in the nineties. Then, through pride and policy, we were a real force again, and not just as a flash-in-the-pan.
Do we just say the dream is over and this is the reality of our true level? Or do we reject as a lie that conveniently suits and enriches two men, Pardew and Ashley, and no-one else?
lesh
Apr 29, 2014 at 2:36 PM
Comment #67Ian Toon.
I too remember the flak KK encountered from our fans when selling Andy( Andrew) Cole and not immediately replacing him.
But and unlike this duplicitous crew, when Keegan urged the baying fans to ‘Trust me’ I felt that I could do just that.
Could anyone believe a word that oozes from the mealy mouth of Pardew or and it might be unfair to say it at this early stage of his job as MD, Charnley?
A pinch of salt’s not enough to take with their comments and allusions, we need the whole of Bonneville’s covering!
Once bitten twice shy? Once? The lies are ongoing.
What a state of affairs
Munster Mag
Apr 29, 2014 at 2:39 PM
Comment #68Lilongwe, the football has been an improvement, overall, given how bad it was last season. Like other, I want a new manager, but i dont want some tool like Big Eck or a whippersnapper who has had little positive influence at Cardiff like Catchy’s hero. As I said, to neutrals, we are where we probably deserve to be. Underperforming NUFC, but no Bobby or KK to boost us. No Gazza Waddlers or Beardo’s . No decent coaches under Pardew either. No investment. Its no wonder the media dont hand the manager, and in fairness, to be balanced, he can argue a certain defence of himself. Lets face it, we were doing ok ( bar cups ) till Cabaye left so he has a defence ( pity his defenders cant defend !!! )
wolfshead@toon
Apr 29, 2014 at 2:40 PM
Comment #69toonking
arsenal have only been beaten four times at the emirates this season so i think a shock win was never likely haha
Ibizatoon
Apr 29, 2014 at 2:41 PM
Comment #70Wayayman…I don’t think many believe that a better manager couldn’t get a better style of football from the players we currently have.
Obviously a good manager can change a teams fortunes without changing the players, as shown by Pulis at Stoke – but then that is about results, not style.
I obviously don’t know for sure, but I believe that the players discontent is not purely with Pardew and his tactics. Everything about the club screams no ambition and that can only deflate players and whilst we’re on it, the manager. Not that we should feel sorry for Pardew about that part, it’s becoming more and more obvious that he is heavily involved in this aspect of Ashleys plan.
Someone mention earlier on about Martinez needing 6 players this summer. It will be interesting to see what happens, as we’ve seen under Ashley, he just isn’t interested in giving the team what it needs. For me, that will be a major turnoff for any potential manager.
Having to work under tight restrictions is one thing, systematically trying to underachieve is another matter altogether, which is what i believe to be the model at NUFC.
Bottom line is, it’s not one or the other, Ashley has made Pardews job difficult and then Pardew isn’t really up to the task either.
Total recipe for disaster.
wolfshead@toon
Apr 29, 2014 at 2:43 PM
Comment #71munster
we were also doing well when mr t was captain even pardew admitted he was a revelation so it was another head scratcher when he gave the armband back to colo as soon as he was fit again
Munster Mag
Apr 29, 2014 at 2:44 PM
Comment #72B and B, I am as firm a defender of NUFC as any, but if I was to ask a football fan aged 20-60 of what their perception was of NUFC they would say – mid table team with lots of fans. A kind of Aston Villa, or Man City before the money. I am disgusted that we cannot find owners who want to drive us on, but the last giy that got close was the local businessman who couldnt pay all that Ashley demanded.
Ibizatoon
Apr 29, 2014 at 2:47 PM
Comment #73BandB…I knew I should have gone with my gut and my gut said “sh*t”!
The whole argument of somethings “level” is completely flawed anyway. It’s not a question of where we are, it’s where we’re heading. You can be a small entity with dreams of growing and achieving great things, but the mind set has to be there. It just isn’t at NUFC and that is the problem, imo. If we don’t want to succeed, then we wont. It’s simple really.
I’m not sure if I’m pleased or not to hear I’m not alone in not being able to call what will come next. It changes from day to day, I go from surely this must be nearing it’s end to, as you say, “we ain’t seen noting yet”. – Both make sense depending on your viewpoint, but only one mans viewpoint seems to really matter in this. That is unless we take to the bunkers. Still, I suppose we sit and wait for now.
Munster Mag
Apr 29, 2014 at 2:49 PM
Comment #74Incidentally unless Mbiwa get a decent defender beside him, you can forget his. He’s not very good, and another question re our genius scout’s ability. As for Santon, spare me. One of the major flaws of NUFC is that the manager dosnt seem to be the main chooser of talent, as it should be at all clubs. As I have said for years all purchases are based on value for money, not footballing ability solely.
wolfshead@toon
Apr 29, 2014 at 2:49 PM
Comment #75ibiza
if no players are bought in the summer we should all give up and move to your place in the sun 🙂
Average_Contents
Apr 29, 2014 at 2:52 PM
Comment #76Just bear with me on this one lads, it’s a rather long article by Luke Edwards in the telegraph but I feel it sums us up perfectly bearing in mind he doesn’t support NUFC or isn’t from the city and therefore gives a pretty apt description of us!
Alan Pardew may yet cling onto his job, but you will be hard pushed to find a supporter who thinks that should happen
After six successive defeats, after six moribund performances, emotions are running high at Newcastle United and understandably so.
This is a dreadful and embarrassing run. It is a stain on the character and professionalism of the players. It is a consequence of a club that lacks ambition, but will it end up costing Alan Pardew his job as manager
I will weigh up that question shortly, but first let’s get the emotional side of things out of the way. To cover Newcastle United properly you have to understand the way the football club interacts with the city and the region before any objective analysis as to whether Pardew deserves to lose his job can take place.
Newcastle United is a remarkable club for one reason. The loyalty and passion of its fans. That is not the wild boast of a Geordie. I’m not a Newcastle fan and I never will be, but I have lived here far longer than I lived in the East End of London and I like to think I understand the city and its football club.
This is a club that has not won a major trophy since 1969, a club that has not won the league title since 1927, yet it is a club that has had the third highest average attendance in the country.
Newcastle fans do not support their team because it is successful, they do not expect to win things. Contrary to what you may have heard, expectations are not too high on Tyneside.
They may believe the club has the potential to compete in the Champions League – it has done several times before – but they do not expect to be there. They may want to reach cup finals and play in Europe, but why shouldn’t a club that won the FA Cup three times in the 1950s and finished in the top six several times over the course of the last 20 years aspire to repeat these things?
The only thing Newcastle fans really expect is a team that plays like it cares as much about the club as they do. What they deserve, is a team that has a go, that goes into the game on the front foot, a team that tries to win every game, not one that merely tries to avoid defeat.
They want entertainment, they want to go to matches hoping they will win the game no matter who the opposition are. They want a team they can be proud of.
It would be wrong to say Newcastle fans care more than others do, but there are not many cities, if any in Britain, that care more about what is happening at the football club that represents it.
Newcastle-upon-Tyne is a supremely confident city. It does not worry about what people in London, Leeds or Manchester think about it, it does not mimic or strive to be something it is not. It is a distinct and proud city in a proud region. The football club is the most obvious means to express that pride.
It is the same 12 miles away in Sunderland. People leave the North East for economic and other reasons, but I bet if you know someone who has, they still support their old local football team.
That is what football means to people in the North East and it is why Newcastle’s lack of ambition causes such outrage and it is why Pardew is standing on the edge of a precipice. The question is, will Mike Ashley – he makes the big decisions not new managing director Lee Charnley – shove him off it?
Newcastle fans do not have any pride in their team at the moment. They have been putting up with woeful performances and results since Christmas.
They know Ashley is ultimately to blame because he has failed to sanction a permanent signing since January 2013 and seems happy just to stay in the Premier League, but they are sick of cutting Pardew slack because of it.
This is not just about losing six games on the trot. This is not a team suffering a blip, this is a team that has suffered a catastrophic loss of motivation.
There seems to be a sense of bewilderment, nationally, that fans should be calling for Pardew to be sacked when the club sit ninth in the table and have been in the top 10 – the objective set by the board last August – since October, but this is not a one off. This happened at the end of last season too and the club were almost relegated as a result.
Newcastle have lost 14 of their last 19 games in all competitions. They have also failed to score in 13 of those. Whatever the players are being told, they no longer seem to be listening. They are a weaker side without Yohan Cabaye, no doubt, but they are still nowhere near as bad as their form has been.
Newcastle’s players stunned a national audience on Monday night with their lack of organisation, creativity and determination against an Arsenal side that never got out of third gear.
The truly damning thing is Newcastle’s followers expected that to happen. They have been suffering performances like that for four months.
Pardew is not solely to blame for Newcastle’s malaise. He is a good manager, but so too is David Moyes and he lasted less than a year at Manchester United.
Pardew no longer seems able to inspire his players. He has always managed Newcastle with one hand tied behind his back, but he has been happy to defend the regime and the way they do things. That might keep him his job, despite the animosity towards him on Tyneside.
Ashley is not daft. He will recognise the risk of falling crowds next season if things do not change. Unfortunately for Pardew, the easiest thing to change at the end of the season is the manager.
That will not heal all of Newcastle’s ills, but it will appease fans who have fallen out of love with those who represent them in black and white stripes.
Pardew is a convenient scapegoat and regardless of whether Newcastle beat Cardiff on Saturday to all but secure a top 10 finish, he is in danger of the sack.
He deserves sympathy, but he has rebuilt his reputation at Newcastle and he will get another job on the back of it.
He may yet cling on. Ashley may reward him for defending the regime by offering him a final opportunity to turn things around at the start of next season following a summer recruitment drive.
But you will be hard pushed to find a supporter who thinks that should happen. Rarely have Newcastle fans been so depressed watching their football team and that is the saddest thing I’ve ever had to write about them.
Munster Mag
Apr 29, 2014 at 2:52 PM
Comment #77The sad thing is that Ashley could sack pardew, replace him with a foreign coach, sack some of the useless guys like Carver, and still continue his model – with more success. But now, I think things will get worse. We will keep Pardew, buy brits, get worse value, spend less therefore and possibly face relegation. A new face is needed if only because Pardew cant seem to lift spirits. There is no way he has lost the dressing room but the players need a new voice.
Average_Contents
Apr 29, 2014 at 2:53 PM
Comment #78Read it all its good I think
Ibizatoon
Apr 29, 2014 at 2:54 PM
Comment #79Wolfs…Well, the local team here aren’t exactly ambitious either 🙂 But then, there is the sunshine.
Munster…I don’t know what to say about M’Biwa anymore. He was clearly a decent enough player before he arrived, he captained Montpellier to the French title. He also looked good when given a run in the team alongside Willo. Since then, he has been shocking. I have been putting it down to confidence and playing a bit part, but his recent idea of how to tackle a player is so shocking it’s not even funny.
Certainly a case for Pardewism, a term I don’t really like to use.
As for Santon, I wont get you started.
BandB
Apr 29, 2014 at 2:57 PM
Comment #80Munster,
I agree you assessment may be true. And I fall into that group. But I am not one of those people.
Please, have another look at Ed’s by no means comprehensive list of recent embarrassing attainments.
Since Christmas we have played nearly every team in the league. And almost all of them have beaten us. Too many of them have thrashed us.
We have lost even the most basic requirement, the ability to kick the ball in the goal.
And tell me whether you would still categorize that as “middling.”