Newcastle’s Sad Premier League Stats Under Mike Ashley

Mike Ashley bought Newcastle United back in June of 2007, a couple of months after we started this blog, and since then we have completed seven full seasons under Mike Ashley and in the Premier League have only two top ten finishes to show for it – both under Alan Pardew.

lee charnley and mike ashley

Lee Charnley and Mike Ashley

We point that out because lately we hear the goal of the club is to finish in the top ten in the Premier League – but  for all except two seasons in the last seven we haven’t been able to do that.

Newcastle even managed to get relegated in Ashley’s second  season in charge, when we had all of four managers in one season – Kevin Keegan, Joe Kinnear, Chris Hughton and Alan Shearer – and that alone helped us to get relegated for the first time ever from the Premier League – with only 34 points from our 38 games.

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We came straight back up from the Championship in the next season with a record 102 points under manager Chris Hughton, but then Chris was fired the following December.

So under Mike Ashley we have had six full seasons in the Premier League and we have averaged around 46 points in those six seasons.

That would have had us in 11th place last season, joint 9th the season before and 13th the season before that – so with our average points total we are somewhere just below mid table.

With the actual points we have gained each season Newcastle have finished twice in the top 10 since 2007, and four times in the bottom half of the Premier League.

And when we were 5th in 2012 we had 65 points, 16 points more than we have gained in any other PL season under Mike Ashley. 🙁

Those are very sobering statistics for Mike Ashley’s Newcastle, and this season we’ll be lucky if we can make the top 10, and at the moment we are in 11th place on 27 points from 22 games – but it seems we will need to make do with a caretaker manager – probably John Carver –  through the rest of the season.

Can you think of any other club in the Premier league who would make do with a caretaker manager because they let their manager go in mid-season (for compensation of course), and then couldn’t find a good enough replacement to take over before the summer?

And can you think of any other Premier League club that have sold their very best player in the January transfer window for big bucks and not replaced them.

Neither can we – because no other club would be that daft – but we’ve done that three times in the last four years.

That is very sadly the way Newcastle United is being run by Mike Ashley, and we often wonder why he ever bought Newcastle United – what’s he getting out of it?

The only way we can see Newcastle becoming successful under Ashley, is if the owner agrees to invest all the big money we are making these days from the Premier League, back into the club in terms of improving the facilities, but most of all in improving the squad and buying good players and keeping them.

But we just cannot see that happening somehow.

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131 comments so far

  • catchy in norway

    Jan 25, 2015 at 2:05 PM

    Comment #1

    the club is a joke right now , no doubt about it,

    bilson is happy though

  • Jail for Ashley

    Jan 25, 2015 at 2:08 PM

    Comment #2

    Repost, as I want an answer.
    Could anyone of the 29% of people who voted that they feel better about the club after that “interview” please explain to me how !

  • davetoon

    Jan 25, 2015 at 2:09 PM

    Comment #3

    good article Ed

  • jesperfuglsang - capt'n awesome of the lemon crew

    Jan 25, 2015 at 2:09 PM

    Comment #4

    …and we are starting to be a bit of a joke as well 🙁

    …sad times!

  • jesperfuglsang - capt'n awesome of the lemon crew

    Jan 25, 2015 at 2:12 PM

    Comment #5

    And show me another fanbase who would stand for this ridicule?

  • catchy in norway

    Jan 25, 2015 at 2:16 PM

    Comment #6

    I’m snowboarding today , incase you were wondering , 🙂

  • jesperfuglsang - capt'n awesome of the lemon crew

    Jan 25, 2015 at 2:19 PM

    Comment #7

    Catchy…sounds much more fun than what I am doing 🙂

  • Our Toon

    Jan 25, 2015 at 2:26 PM

    Comment #8

    Describes all that is wrong with the club yet the spineless Geordies that we are still do FCUK all to help us kick him out

  • catchy in norway

    Jan 25, 2015 at 2:26 PM

    Comment #9

    Jesper , I bet yours is less painful though , couple of good crashes today,
    dare I ask what your doing ?

    right last trip up the lift 🙂

  • jasonmag

    Jan 25, 2015 at 2:31 PM

    Comment #10

    Money is far more important to the owner than any on field sucsess. Cup runs and derby wins would make us happy, but fatty cannot even let us have that.

  • lesh

    Jan 25, 2015 at 2:31 PM

    Comment #11

    Looks like we’ve got the Scandinavians out in force. Be warned gentlemen, SD’ll be after you if you don’t keep your heads down.

    You’ll know that North Koreans disappear off the face of the earth and Ashleyski’ll have your names in his little red book.

  • Jail for Ashley

    Jan 25, 2015 at 2:33 PM

    Comment #12

    Our Toon,
    It’s all very well calling us spineless but without clear leadership and a strategy as to what to do next it’s going to be hard to get people organised.

  • Ron Knee

    Jan 25, 2015 at 2:37 PM

    Comment #13

    Bristol City holding their own against WHU.

  • jesperfuglsang - capt'n awesome of the lemon crew

    Jan 25, 2015 at 2:39 PM

    Comment #14

    Catchy…well today hasn’t been too bad since junior is at his grand parents this weekend, so it’s been a day of brunch in the city 🙂

    …culture and dinner last night and a day at the movies Friday!

    Last weekend of peace since the missus is expecting 😉

  • jesperfuglsang - capt'n awesome of the lemon crew

    Jan 25, 2015 at 2:42 PM

    Comment #15

    …but I do think excepting that we are spineless is a start! Until we except our responsibilities I don’t think we can get organised!

    …we are half way there I suppose! Does of you who haven’t come to terms with this, how much time do you think you need?

  • jesperfuglsang - capt'n awesome of the lemon crew

    Jan 25, 2015 at 2:42 PM

    Comment #16

    *does = those

  • Alternative Headline

    Jan 25, 2015 at 2:46 PM

    Comment #17

    I dont see how a manager / coach can be given a top 10 ‘goal’ at the start of the season when we tout our best players every Jan without replacements

  • jesperfuglsang - capt'n awesome of the lemon crew

    Jan 25, 2015 at 2:47 PM

    Comment #18

    Lesh… We need to infiltrate Fatty’s organization and bring it down from within…

    …I feel and “Interview” moment coming on 😉

  • ToonTiger

    Jan 25, 2015 at 2:51 PM

    Comment #19

    The club have exposed themselves as Ashleys dictatorship which most of us knew anyway. Tough times ahead.

    Unless, we get De Boer or similar or even if Ash sells up only then will we see any progress

  • Our Toon

    Jan 25, 2015 at 2:52 PM

    Comment #20


    I call us spineless for that very reason mate, I include myself in the spineless category. Although I’ve stopped going to games it only provided space for someone else to attend. As fans we could look at what Rangers did the other week but we won’t mobilise in such a manner.

    Why do 50k still go? For what purpose are these people attending? Is it for the better of the club or is it to the detriment of the club?

    Remember when KK sold Andy Cole and those fans questioned him outside the ground as to why and what he was doing!! The fans are playing the waiting game for fat man to leave but he ain’t going nowhere until the discontent is actually shown!! If fans must persist with watching at SJP do it the Spanish way and get the white hankies out!!

  • mindshaft

    Jan 25, 2015 at 2:52 PM

    Comment #21

    See Blackburn had less than 6000 fans for yesterdays game vs Swansea – that could be us in a few years !!!
    Relegation, sell best players , same sh1t ownership milking every last penny …

  • mindshaft

    Jan 25, 2015 at 2:54 PM

    Comment #22

    I can certainly see us fighting relegation this season – next weeks game is crucial , lose that and we’ll have pretty much lost or drawn against most of the teams below us !!

  • Tsunki

    Jan 25, 2015 at 3:00 PM

    Comment #23

    According to Pennywell Jeffy I seem to be a know it all, but forgive me if I point out to Ed that surely those figures above are FACT!s and not statistics, as the latter are figures extrapolated for the purpose of it’s calculator to ‘prove’ their particular point or further their agenda.

    The FACT!ual figures above need no massaging or qualification and stand unassailed and uncontested as the mediocre record of these years under the lifeblood-draining Ashley vampire regime. They are what they are, boys and girls.

    Please, by all means, do tell me how these figures represent all that is good about nufc under their enslaving yoke. I’ll tell you what they don’t reveal though, they don’t reveal the utter contempt of the customers of this parasitic clan.

  • Tsunki

    Jan 25, 2015 at 3:08 PM

    Comment #24

    Jail @2 – there will always be mackems,trolls, Ashley employees,and sheep. Sadly there seem to be a lot of the latter.

  • BlacknWhiteBarmy

    Jan 25, 2015 at 3:08 PM

    Comment #25

    JFa – did not vote but Im guessing there are a number of WUM out there.

  • jesperfuglsang - capt'n awesome of the lemon crew

    Jan 25, 2015 at 3:09 PM

    Comment #26

    Tsunki…there you go and kill the blog again with that kind of thinking!

    …I like you but…

  • Tsunki

    Jan 25, 2015 at 3:15 PM

    Comment #27

    The uncomfortable truth is to get rid of Ashley you simply have to stop dropping coins into his money box. Like a cat, if you stop feeding it, it deserts you for someone who will.

    Until the st renewals dry up, the suckers who can give or take footy normally but take their kids along to a discount family ticket match and a din-dins at Frankie & Benny’s after they’ve bought the latest Wonga emblazoned kit at the club shop will keep that money lifeline going for Fat M.

  • Tsunki

    Jan 25, 2015 at 3:16 PM

    Comment #28

    Jesper – ha ha I see what you did there!


  • Tsunki

    Jan 25, 2015 at 3:17 PM

    Comment #29

    Crazy Swedes!



    Jan 25, 2015 at 3:18 PM

    Comment #30

    2007-08 43 12 – We playd good
    2008-09 34 18 – relegated – We playd bad
    2009-10 102 1 – promoted – we playd good
    2010-11 46 12 – We playd bad
    2011-12 65 5 – we playd good
    2012-13 41 16 – We playd bad
    2013-14 49 10 – We playd good
    2014-15 ?? ?? – We playd bad

  • jimmysmith

    Jan 25, 2015 at 3:25 PM

    Comment #31

    That photo is notable for two things. First, Charnley looks an incredible bootlick, and the other, Ashley appears oblivious to him and also to be wearing a tent, or at least a shirt based on a tent, although surely they didn’t have to go and make it out of one.

  • cyprus

    Jan 25, 2015 at 3:33 PM

    Comment #32

    You blame MA for the crap football but not the coaches or your hero, AP. Surely, they must take some of the blame. The team is in the top 7 in terms of football value and round about there in terms of salaries…. So… do you see where I’m going?

    I know there’s nothing to talk about so let’s stir up some hate mail, but you should know better, man.

  • Tsunki

    Jan 25, 2015 at 3:35 PM

    Comment #33

    Jimmy he needs more hair bug maybe this is the look mike is going for…

  • Moonraker15

    Jan 25, 2015 at 3:40 PM

    Comment #34


    The very reason we finish 10th is because we have weakened the team; otherwise we could be top 6 easily !!

  • Transfer Sage

    Jan 25, 2015 at 3:44 PM

    Comment #35

    Jesper, Jail, Our Toon, all others

    I think as a club/fanbase we need to hit rock bottom before people will mobilise as the realisation of the clubs behaviour under ashley has leaked out in dribs and drabs so people all have different levels of tolerance for the regime.

    Once we hit rock bottom, can’t be long after that statement and the growing pressure in the media which a lot listen to, then maybe we will see unity and action.

    For example, when relegated a huge number of fans started to really attack ashley and he tried to sell the club, as he couldn’t for his value he decided to make sure we got promoted, keeping key players, so that he’d protect the club (“his investment”).

    Hopefully the time is coming.

  • jesperfuglsang - capt'n awesome of the lemon crew

    Jan 25, 2015 at 3:53 PM

    Comment #36

    Tsunki… 😉

  • jesperfuglsang - capt'n awesome of the lemon crew

    Jan 25, 2015 at 3:57 PM

    Comment #37

    TS…I did ask how long it would take for the rest of the fan base to come to terms with it 🙂

    …I an basically just waiting

  • optimistic prime

    Jan 25, 2015 at 3:58 PM

    Comment #38

    IMO there’s still a lot of fans hoping or believing the slug will appoint FDB so won’t be prepared to turn on him.

    I’m not even sure season ticket sales will take that much of a hit as fans will keep them just incase, this will be the last time 😉

    I wish someone would just squish the slug.

  • Our Toon

    Jan 25, 2015 at 4:15 PM

    Comment #39


    I don’t think he was being realistic when he apparently tried to sell us for the 2nd time after relegation. Fans should realise MA will sell the club but it’s easier for him to do so now whilst we are in the prem rather than in the championship where he won’t get rid because of how undervalued we will have become. Let’s all wait another 7 years and see if he’s still here or act now and get our club back in a painful 12 months

  • Average_Contents

    Jan 25, 2015 at 4:17 PM

    Comment #40

    Instead of squishing the slug which tends to leave said slugs entrails festooned upon the assailants trainer/boot/loafer, might I suggest using the tried and tested method of salting….now who owns a salt vat big enough to cover it in its entirety?

    I feel a big job is about to break out. Is there anybody upto the challenge?


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