Rumors of Huge Newcastle Signings In The Summer

When we were youngsters growing up in Newcastle many many moons ago – actually it was when Newcastle United were actually were winning trophies in the 1950s –  in fact three trophies in five years – when somebody would say something that was kind of unbelievable, we would say pull the other one (a leg) it’s got bells on – and maybe that saying still exists today.

moussa sissoko sent off at west ham

Moussa Sissoko – maybe he’ll play at center-back?

So after just a terrible performance today against Leicester City, who basically tore us apart and scored their first goal after just 37 seconds (what too so long?) and won 3-0 but could have won 10-0, there seems to be leaks about all the money Newcastle will spend in the summer.

Pull the other one it’s got bells on.

But since Newcastle will now probably be relegated – we don’t think that will happen – and the club will have to move to plan B (which of course they will not have) and sign much cheaper players because our revenues will drop significantly in the Championship.

And this time it’s by no means certain we can come straight back up again.

This stuff about big transfers in the summer is simply propaganda from a club that has managed to get themselves relegated since the end of January.

Mike Ashley and Lee Charnley  have decimated both the Newcastle squad and the Newcastle club – and it just doesn’t seem possible how we can still avoid relegation – and the fans are simply disgusted.

And have we heard one squeak from either of the two at the top – are you kidding?

One little problem we have is that apparently there are rumors that Paul Dummett has injured his hamstring, so next week against West Brom – who beat Manchester United 1-0 this afternoon at Old Trafford – we will have Janmaat, Williamson and Dummett all missing.

And if West Brom can beat Manchester United away, they should be able to beat Newcastle United away.

Now who can play with Colo in central defense – let’s think now – who’s over 6 ft tall?

Moussa Sissoko?

We were short of a center-back in January when on New Year’s Day we lost Steven Taylor for the season with an Achilles rupture, but did Ashley bring in another center-back – no way – he sold Mapou Yanga-Mbiwa to Roma and then let Davide Santon leave.

It’s little wonder we have no back four players  left.

Newcastle will have great difficulty to keep the players we already have in the squad this summer, because they will all be running for the door.

And never mind attracting players to a club who have managed to get themselves relegated this year – that will be very difficult.

And to think we did it all without  needing any help from anybody – it was all done in-house.

As we said the people at the top have decimated both the Newcastle squad and the Newcastle club.

107 comments so far

  • Ciaran

    May 2, 2015 at 10:33 PM

    Comment #1

    I swear to the Almighty Ed…

  • toon22

    May 2, 2015 at 10:34 PM

    Comment #2


    Yeh hes been shite for almost a year and hasnt ever played CB.

    Obvious choice.

  • scout

    May 2, 2015 at 10:38 PM

    Comment #3

    He might be over 6ft in height but has the heart of a field mouse.

  • beermonkey

    May 2, 2015 at 10:41 PM

    Comment #4

    not even going to read that article lol

  • toon22

    May 2, 2015 at 10:43 PM

    Comment #5

    And oh yer he is utterly rubbish in the air.


    Exactly who is our current reserve CBs?
    As im sure they will be quite keen to get there chance,no mention of them so wither they arent up to it or simply dont exsist.

    Who do you think is to blame for that?

  • Online Guy

    May 2, 2015 at 10:43 PM

    Comment #6

    January came and went ..who thought we were ok ?

    I didnt..I said so ,…and questioned the insanity of selling or loaning Santon and Mbiwa when we were short and then not buying anyone ..and all this and they knew we had £34 million sitting in the bank ..and we have had a wan*k*er on here saying its no good buying in January !

  • Wandering Geordie

    May 2, 2015 at 10:46 PM

    Comment #7

    Why oh why did Charver start Riviere ? He could have given Chucky a game.We have nothing to lose.

    Just a reminder on how Chucky scored goals

    I have been wandering the streets of Lima after I watched that parcel today…Totally shell shocked by the inept performance by those F ******rs

  • Ibizatoon

    May 2, 2015 at 10:47 PM

    Comment #8

    Online…Mike, Lee and John. Probably in that order.

  • Toon Tang

    May 2, 2015 at 10:47 PM

    Comment #9

    I see Shearer’s not on MOTD tonight but they’ve a ready made replacement in Danny Murphy, the guy looks more like him by the day.

  • Online Guy

    May 2, 2015 at 10:48 PM

    Comment #10

    Lee Charnley is just a clerk of works an admin man ..who is he to make football decisions ? He knows nowt about the game man …Hes an office boy

    I got jumped on last week with that few words about Charnley..its proving to be correct with his January advice to Ashley and then Carver towing the line saying we did not need anyone

    Where is the Ashley apologist this evening ?

    and where is Tim nice but dim ?

  • Online Guy

    May 2, 2015 at 10:49 PM

    Comment #11

    Scout , good comment at #3

  • toonbrother

    May 2, 2015 at 10:50 PM

    Comment #12

    nothing to worry about lads
    colocinni aka bobby moore will save us

  • TorontoToon

    May 2, 2015 at 10:53 PM

    Comment #14

    Any chance we can call up the lad from Forest? At the very least he could give us tips about the league will be in next year!!

  • beermonkey

    May 2, 2015 at 10:54 PM

    Comment #15

    online guy

    what worse is that cash was there in the summer why waste cash on loan fee’s wages and riviere when we could have bought a proven quality striker with an extra 5-7mill if we knew we were looking to ofload mbiwa given the ages and injuries we have had the last 2 3 seasons to centre backs it was suicide to start the season with 3 centre backs again 10mill spent then and even with pards leaving we would not be in this position as we would have had over 30 points in the first half of the season

    all for say 15mill more relegation will cost ?? even if we do survive were going to lose more than 10mill in prize money just for the poor position

  • Online Guy

    May 2, 2015 at 10:54 PM

    Comment #16

    IM off for a walk around the Garden ..and I’m not strutting this evening, my heads down ..there are people on this blog who would make a better fist of running Newcastle United .

    You do know that Ashley is out on the town tonight Laughing and Joking with his cronies in London ?

  • jane

    May 2, 2015 at 10:54 PM

    Comment #17
  • scout

    May 2, 2015 at 10:54 PM

    Comment #18

    Walking the streets of lima sounds like a good day out

  • Blackley and Brownlie

    May 2, 2015 at 10:55 PM

    Comment #19

    I understand the “hope” “no hope” argument. I hope a new rich owner will come in. One who doesn’t want to take anything out of the club and who wants to put 100% devotion and dedication into it. But also someone who is competent in running a football club. You can have all the best intentions in the world but its no good if, like Ashley, you don’t know what you’re doing.

    But there’s no sign that anyone anywhere wants to buy the club, Can you imagine if the fans appeal on tv for a rich owner to come in? That would be embarrassing. Please anyone buy our club and make us successful with all your money.

    No amount of jumping up and down is going to attract a buyer. Even Ashley putting the club up for sale will make no difference. Think about this one point. Do you not think that any serious buyer looking for a football club would not be on the phone to Ashley and his advisers whether the club was up for sale or not. It’s different from a house purchase. There’s millions of houses. But even house buyers who want a particular house that’s not up for sale will actually knock on the door or put a note through the letterbox.

    Even if the fans owned the club, they’d have the same financial considerations as Ashley but without the deep pockets to provide working capital in the bad times. At least they could blame themselves when they waste money in the transfer market and they would because they’ve all got a different opinion. Id be surprised if there wasn’t a good degree of disharmony and rancour in the difficult times. The trouble is the fans haven’t got the wherewithal to buy and run the club. It would be great if they could and make it successful but it’s never got off the ground at NUFC.

  • archaeomag

    May 2, 2015 at 10:55 PM

    Comment #20

    Great news – Jam and yet more jam tomorrow – can’t wait for all this jam, going to be very interesting jam in the summer with lots of new jam to look forward to….
    can you watch the championship in the states?

  • Graeme

    May 2, 2015 at 10:58 PM

    Comment #21

    Online @ 10 – “Clerk of Works” is a very worthwhile position in the Construction Industry, which takes years of training and dedication to achieve.

    Please, do not refer to our erstwhile MD as a “Clerk of Works” – he is a desk wallah, an arse wipe, a jobsworth promoted way beyond his ability to function. He may be a clerk – He will never aspire to be a “Clerk of Works”!!

  • optimistic prime

    May 2, 2015 at 10:59 PM

    Comment #22

    Sissoko should be left back in the kin dressing room for me.

    Play him at CB and I bet he’d still get in the way of his own players, run Forrest run.

    Collocini as well he’s a donkey, stick Anita and Guiterez in there and we’d probably be stronger at CB.

    Play the kids!

    What’s the worst that could happen?

    Get the tea lady to pick the team as well by reading johns leaves. johns licking his lips to give her the signal he hasn’t forgot all she fed him, he’s ready to unleash his secret weapon.

    We need inspiration and all I can think of is tea and scones!

    Get the tea lady back!

  • TorontoToon

    May 2, 2015 at 10:59 PM

    Comment #23

    Actually forget that suggestion (forest kid call up), Carver’s likely to toss him under the bus with everyone one else.

  • Sleepin Giant

    May 2, 2015 at 11:00 PM

    Comment #24


    A single rich oligarch as owner is not the only option, as you must know.
    You are obsessed in knowing the answer to our ownership problems in advance of taking any action. That is a rabbit in the headlights approach.

    Knowing the endgame is reserved for the prescient

  • Wandering Geordie

    May 2, 2015 at 11:01 PM

    Comment #25

    Anyone heard the rumour that Mclaren is to be the new manager on Sunday afternoon…In the Mirror I have been told

  • optimistic prime

    May 2, 2015 at 11:02 PM

    Comment #26

    Woof woof woof

  • Lee Charnley Bunga Party

    May 2, 2015 at 11:04 PM

    Comment #27

    Match of the day analysis and just as I mentioned this morning our midfield was set up wrong before kick off !

    It was woeful it just seems we dont work on anything in training then they showed you the Villa highlights , same formation but implemented properly

    Sherwood looks the real deal as a manager even Cleverly looks decent under him !

  • Blackley and Brownlie

    May 2, 2015 at 11:06 PM

    Comment #28

    Onljne Guy
    In case you hadn’t noticed, I’ve been leading the assault on Charnley.

    Ashley’s the money man. He appoints someone to look after his interests. He has a habit of appointing the wrong people and letting them get on with running the club in accordance with his broad financial policies.

    Nobody takes my point that we have no director of football for our head coach model. It’s not a model I favour but it stands no chance without a director of football. Daft John Gibson thinks it’s obvious that Graham Carr is that man. What s load of tosh. Carr is nothing more than a very well paid scout. That’s what the Fans Forum should be concentrating on to bring the club to account.

  • Online Guy

    May 2, 2015 at 11:06 PM

    Comment #29


    I’m with you all the way on your findings …we just not run right ..Ashley will not change ..its just a billboard ..

    I spoke to Keith Harris mate of Ashleys ..he sold Chelsea and Man utd …I had 2 long conversations with him …different days

    He told me straight..I asked him, is there any chance of Ashley taking the club off the market ..having a rethink about selling it and Keith said ” No chance , his passion for it has gone ..his heart is not in it ..he’s lost his passion for it got no heart in Newcastle now ”

    anyone reading that can quote me in any newspaper or media outlet because its totally true…

    Ashley took the club off the market a while later

    Also Keith is a good mate of Brendan Foster and socialises with my old trainer…he has dinner with him regularly

    If you want any Newcastle News or if there is a sale in the offing Brendan will know first. that’s if Brendan chooses to answer you ..he can be very guarded .

  • MrMojoRisin76

    May 2, 2015 at 11:08 PM

    Comment #30

    These will be my last words to you imo your attitude is disgusting,”we can’t do anything about it so there’s no point trying”.If the soldiers during WW2 had your attitude we’d all be speaking German now.Have you even read Sir Bobby’s “What Is A Club?” statement.Sir Bobby would be doing his nut if he was alive today.

  • Belfast

    May 2, 2015 at 11:10 PM

    Comment #31

    He’s a stamp licker. The boy done good.

    I bet ya he wishes he was still licking the stamps now. Lol

    Probably should have researched Carvers previous forays into management before appointing him. He’ll be kicking himself for that one.

  • Lee Charnley Bunga Party

    May 2, 2015 at 11:10 PM

    Comment #32

    @online guy

    Well if his passion for it is gone why does he not get rid of us ??

  • Lee Charnley Bunga Party

    May 2, 2015 at 11:11 PM

    Comment #33

    The really sad fact is you see people online and lots of fans of other clubs saying the fans are getting what they deserve for forcing “A really great English manager” in Pardew out

  • BandB

    May 2, 2015 at 11:13 PM

    Comment #34


    It is a game for rich men. I have no illusions about that.

    I think it is no coincidence that the clubs struggling around the bottom are owned by a certain type of rich man. Men like Ashley, Tan, Lerner and Fernandez.

    These are not sporting gentlemen. They are muck and brass speculators. and gamblers. They want a guaranteed return, or they won’t invest.

    Fernandez has had a lengthy whinge today about agents and players with their hands in his pockets.

    One should never bet more than one can cheerfully afford to lose. These men seem to be unwilling to lose a penny. Therefore it is probably not the game for them.

  • Belfast

    May 2, 2015 at 11:13 PM

    Comment #35

    Match of the day slaughtered his tactics. There was a few soundbites in that post match interview for Shearers benefit. Unfortunately Shearer wasn’t there.

  • Online Guy

    May 2, 2015 at 11:16 PM

    Comment #36

    Blackley and Brownlie

    I said months ago that Carr is actually the Manager !
    He’s picking the players ! we might as well give him the title.. I read Gibsons crap on dof

    That’s what a manager does ..John Gibson gets on my tits ..I had a bust up with him when he woulkd not let me get a word in ..what a mouth on him ..what a north and south ..he’s a big headed bloke you know …hes mouth almighty like Malcolm McDonald ..they have this very high opinion of them selves and they are always right and anyone else is always wrong thats the way it is with that pair ..

    Tony Pulis would have been a good bloke to get in when pardew left..I said it at the time I like his honesty and effective as he is as a manager not so much his style ..He’s solid and honest so would be no good towing the Ashley line and telling lies to supporters/customers…

    Bring Kevin Keegan in for the last 3 games ..ho ho !

    Did you see my answer to you about the al Jazeera channel and are you going to sue them ?

    I loved your Grandfather growing up ..absolutely loved him.

  • West Lancs Geordie

    May 2, 2015 at 11:18 PM

    Comment #38

    Team Lost last 8
    Carver lost the plot
    Carver lost the dressing room
    Players lost their fight, dignity & passion
    Fans lost heart
    Mike Ashley get lost quick
    Why would McLaren come to this shambles?
    We need a miracle man now

  • Blackley and Brownlie

    May 2, 2015 at 11:19 PM

    Comment #39

    You’re not doing anything though. Jack shit. Staying away.

    I’d rather we get points and so I will not stay away. Staying up is more important than getting rid of Ashley at this moment in time. There’s no reason why staying up and getting rid of him are incompatible. You don’t know how to get rid of him so I don’t know how you can say otherwise.

    BTW, don’t cry Si.

  • Online Guy

    May 2, 2015 at 11:20 PM

    Comment #40

    Lee bunga

    it was about 4 years back the conversation I had with Keith ,,great bloke btw…and im wondering the same as you .it is a strategic plan long term though to use us as a billboard and scrape along in the prem compete in cups or league that’s deliberate, …he dont own us to win anything ..he’s been found out big time .


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