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Howay The Lads!!

New Signing Assures Newcastle Fans – Results Will Start Coming

4:54 pm, Monday, February 15th, 2016 by Dr. Ed Harrison · 97 Comments

England international Andros Townsend was out Man of the Match for the game on Saturday at Stamford Bridge, when we were again taken apart on the road – this time 5-1 at Chelsea.

That follows the 3-0 demolition at Everton in our last away game and that was the sixth consecutive defeat on the road for Newcastle in all competitions – absolutely pathetic.

But new signings Andros Townsend and Jonjo Shelvey both played well with Andros scoring a terrific goal in the last minute of normal time to open his account at Newcastle.


Andros Townsend in action on Saturday

But Townsend has said that he thinks we have the players to turn this around – and he had this to say to the BBC:

“It’s nothing in the dressing room, the lads are not coming here scared.” “We came here full of confidence – we felt we were good enough to get a point but on the day we were nowhere near.”

“We’ve got the players in the dressing room to get us out of this situation.” “I’ve no doubt in my mind that eventually we will get it right, things will start clicking and the results will start coming.”

Steve McClaren has said an improvement is on the way ever since the first game but that was 26 league games and six months ago and we are still 3rd bottom of the league table. with a measly 24 points from 26 games.

If we lose badly against Stoke two weeks on Wednesday then Mike Ashley could call time on McClaren but we would have lost the two weeks a new manager could have been bedded in if he was brought in now.

Comments welcome.

Tags: Andros Townsend · Coaching · Head coach · Jonjo Shelvey · Newcastle News

97 responses so far ↓

  • 1 brklyngeordie // Feb 15, 2016 at 5:00 PM

    Townsend has come out and defended the club and our fight more then players that have been here for years really like the guy for that maybe future Captain? Respect him

  • 2 hibbitt // Feb 15, 2016 at 5:00 PM

    not showing that confidence on the pitch looked like a lot of headless chickens on saturday ……..i for one blame the players every bit as much as the coaches for saturdays result

  • 3 Blackley and Brownlie // Feb 15, 2016 at 5:01 PM

    Andros, what was Jonjo going mad at Makro about? Was it the same thing that had Toon Tang pulling his hair out, mate?

  • 4 Wayayman // Feb 15, 2016 at 5:02 PM

    Theere’s the problem right there. The players went there feeling they were good enough for a point? FFS! What level is the confidence if they go there with a draw on their mind? I’d love to hear a McClaren team talk.

  • 5 hibbitt // Feb 15, 2016 at 5:03 PM

    only because its in his contract PR bullshit

  • 6 Blackley and Brownlie // Feb 15, 2016 at 5:03 PM

    Bishop always writes a script for the MOTM.

  • 7 goommy // Feb 15, 2016 at 5:06 PM

    I know we can’t instantly turn black into white and we will get better soon. But truth is our form last game with Chelsea really scared the shit out of me..

  • 8 posada // Feb 15, 2016 at 5:12 PM

    B and B.
    Jonjo having a go at Makro.
    Have to say I missed that. Can you add more to it.

  • 9 Lindisfarne // Feb 15, 2016 at 5:13 PM

    Hindsight is so over rated. If Shteve had played Colback in place of Aarons from the start and his injury had re-occurred, then those saying it was stupid would still be saying it for a different reason.

  • 10 John Akomfrah // Feb 15, 2016 at 5:15 PM

    Mclaren will have us down Ashley could give a shit or he would be gone by now.

  • 11 GeordieTwo // Feb 15, 2016 at 5:20 PM

    So we can forget about Matip coming then. He’s off to Liverpool in the summer on a free.

  • 12 GeordieTwo // Feb 15, 2016 at 5:23 PM

    Well, we didn’t need any defenders anyway. Harrumph. We’ve got loads of good ones. There’s errr Good, and ummmm Saylor, aaaaannd Colo, and also Mbemba….. That’s loads isn’t it? And they’re always fit…. That’s what I like about them…..

  • 13 Lindisfarne // Feb 15, 2016 at 5:24 PM


    It gets worse, according to Shteve they went on the field with the knowledge that Chelsea would try to steam roller them and they thought they would come away with a point. Double bubble burst.

    Was it the Head Coaches tactical plan to boot it long to a single player up front in the hope of counter acting the high pressing? Or did they just bend over because they are mentally weak and lack a team ethic.

  • 14 GeordieTwo // Feb 15, 2016 at 5:25 PM

    Can anybody think of any other club that has so many always fit, top, top defenders? I mean it’s embarrassing how many we have……

  • 15 GeordieTwo // Feb 15, 2016 at 5:28 PM

    Yes, that’s correct Lindisfarne @13. We are mentally weak, lack a team ethic, and the tactical plan was to boot it long to a lone, isolated striker. Also we don’t like playing away (especially Wij), we don’t like damp, soggy pitches. we don’t like playing teams that have the bit in their teeth, and we don’t like having to win matches. It’s all just too inconvenient you see….. Harrumph.

  • 16 firebug666 // Feb 15, 2016 at 5:29 PM

    Oh I think there is little doubt about our destination if the idiots destroying the club are left without guidance or at best replacement.

    The only person who can do anything about it is Ashley, and he’s not having a very good year, losing his battle with Rangers, SD producing poor market results, being sued for £14m by some finance guru, and Newcastle heading for the championship.

    If he gets his finger out, he could at least try to save Newcastle, though him being football incompetent I’m not sure what he can do.

  • 17 GeordieTwo // Feb 15, 2016 at 5:30 PM

    What we do like is nice sunny, holidays, laying on the beach after a nice nosh with a lovely beverage, dozing off listening to Steve blather on about footy etc.

  • 18 Tsunki // Feb 15, 2016 at 5:33 PM

    According you Richard Keys, Mike may be thinking about baling from nufc. Probably why I dont read newsnow so much these days.

  • 19 toon kk // Feb 15, 2016 at 5:33 PM

    Tbf it doesn’t matter which team we play, if they start on the front foot, come at us with pace and don’t give us time on the ball we panic, we start knocking the ball back and sideways, our whole team make rash decisions and basically turn into headless chickens.
    It’s gone on for years.

  • 20 GeordieTwo // Feb 15, 2016 at 5:34 PM

    Steve’s latest team talk:
    “Now come on lads. Can you not win one for me? Can you not at least make an effort? Paul could you get me another of those lovely cocktail weenies please? And a gin and tonic? Yes, that would be lovely Paul. Are the lads ok for drinks? Now, where was I? Oh yes, soooooo I think we need another 5 wins to be on the safe side lads so please think of something clever to do on the pitch for a change……

  • 21 Tsunki // Feb 15, 2016 at 5:34 PM

    According to. You.

  • 22 Tsunki // Feb 15, 2016 at 5:37 PM

    I think they go to Spain for tactical reasons. Apparently you don’t just get a salt and pepper shaker at the breakfast table, you also get an oil and a balsamic vinegar pourer as well.

    Now, you, mitrovic, you are the salt cellar. This big bad vinegar bottle is the defender BOOOO! Now this toothpick is little old Townsend….

  • 23 Back Door Man // Feb 15, 2016 at 5:37 PM

    A plague on all these washed-up, out of condition, middle aged ex-managers whose names keep being mentioned as replacements for poor dumb Wally. All these alternatives are failures; wheezing red-nose fools the lot of them … clones of Wally. The net needs to be cast for a proper motivator … mind, I haven’t a clue where one could be found!

  • 24 GeordieTwo // Feb 15, 2016 at 5:37 PM

    With the excellent ownership, management, fitness, training, and overall zesty approach to footy we should be good to go for years and years in the Championship. That’s where the big money is apparently…..

  • 25 Blackley and Brownlie // Feb 15, 2016 at 5:38 PM

    I understand Jonjo was looking to Makro for some direction and leadership and seemed unimpressed that Makro was found somewhat wanting. I don’t know how true that is but in those situations when plan A has been comprehensively blown out of the water, I’d be flabbergasted if the players weren’t looking to the bench for plan B. I didn’t see a plan B, at least nothing worthy of being called a plan.

  • 26 Tsunki // Feb 15, 2016 at 5:39 PM

    There is a Lazy Susan of managers which Charnley scans as they revolve in and out of view. The burleys, dowies etc all slowly turn by as he wiggles his fingers and says ” hmmmmm.”

  • 27 John Akomfrah // Feb 15, 2016 at 5:39 PM

    Did they start with a plan

    i doubt it very mucho

  • 28 John Akomfrah // Feb 15, 2016 at 5:40 PM


  • 29 Blackley and Brownlie // Feb 15, 2016 at 5:41 PM

    In fact, it transpires that Makro is giving himself a nice holiday away from it all to think about a plan B. It’s good that he’s realised so soon that he might need one. He’s got 17 days to come up with something in case Jonjo asks him again.

  • 30 firebug666 // Feb 15, 2016 at 5:41 PM

    Tsunki @18

    If only eh!

    If he was to sell, I dread to imagine to whom it would be, but hell I’ll take it anyway.

  • 31 Blackley and Brownlie // Feb 15, 2016 at 5:43 PM

    Is it managers, head coaches or cuddly toys?

  • 32 GeordieTwo // Feb 15, 2016 at 5:43 PM

    More from Steve:
    Think light feet lads. Think clever little nice slow back passes. Think time to send a fifty yard job straight to Terry. Think about it before you do it though. Here’s me having to watch you lot make a hash of it! Can you not just make me proud for once? Oh what’s the use? You don’t care! Somebody wake up Mitrovich over there! What? Oh, ta Paul. I’ll just take a minute to finish these appies lads. Then it’s straight back to the important footy talk……

  • 33 GeordieTwo // Feb 15, 2016 at 5:47 PM

    Our problems are over lads! Asaf Domb! Asaf Domb is available! We can get him for a nice little wage and some kosher deli meats! Beautiful!

  • 34 Blackley and Brownlie // Feb 15, 2016 at 5:47 PM

    A plan A, a plan B, free advertising, a cuddly toy and 12 cup finals. HWTL!

  • 35 GeordieTwo // Feb 15, 2016 at 5:48 PM

    Let’s Domb it up! Come on Ashley, act now while you can!

  • 36 Tsunki // Feb 15, 2016 at 5:48 PM

    Ask Mr Charnley. There is no plan. There is never a plan at nufc. it’s policy.

    “Steve, the reason you are here is because of lack of planning. I’d like to draw your attention to section 3 of your Written Statement of Employment, under part b, ‘Contingency Planning’, where it expressly forbids you to have any. We don’t mind you doing weed or having a few jars of a morning training session, but if we catch you drawing up any alternative arrangements, for ANYTHING mind you, your out the door quicker than you can say Johnny Carver. Got that? Great. Let’s press on. Section 4 now, ‘Player Requests’…..”

  • 37 Jib // Feb 15, 2016 at 5:50 PM

    I personally don’t think Ashley is remotely thinking about selling the club or replacing McClaren.

    The cogniscenti who follow football finance closely , believe the next buyer of a PL club will come from China.

  • 38 hibbitt // Feb 15, 2016 at 5:50 PM

    don’t give up your day job what ever you had you lost it …… sorry but you just aren’t funny anymore

  • 39 Tsunki // Feb 15, 2016 at 5:52 PM

    “… well that wraps up the employment particulars, Steve. Before I ask the board members if they have any questions for you, it really all depends on whether you have any answers…..”


    ” Excellent Steve! I’m sure we’ve got the right man. Again.”

  • 40 toon kk // Feb 15, 2016 at 5:52 PM

    I liked Doumbia’s first touches on Saturday!!!! Looks well rusty tbh, but I’ll give him the benefit of doubt. He may yet surprise us.

  • 41 Belfast // Feb 15, 2016 at 5:53 PM

    Spammer out.

    Let’s be honest they aren’t going to sack him. They’ll stick with him until the end of the season just like Carver and probably even if we get relegated.

  • 42 Belfast // Feb 15, 2016 at 5:54 PM

    Jib did you sneak in the fire exits? 🙂

  • 43 GeordieTwo // Feb 15, 2016 at 5:55 PM

    Ta hibbit. I’m retired so I’ll be on here as often as possible to cheer you up mate.

  • 44 Blackley and Brownlie // Feb 15, 2016 at 5:55 PM

    (Inane grin) The result wasn’t important. We’re not getting hung up on the result. It was a chance to test ourselves, try out a few things. More of a training session. People will understand that. We had one similar against Sunderland. Not everybody is back and fit. We’re still waiting for one or two. That was a good Norwegian outfit we played. They’re no mugs. You can see that. Today was not about the opposition. For us it was about dealing with the ball. That’s what we need to do. I think Jonjo understands that. (Inane grin)

  • 45 Wandering Geordie // Feb 15, 2016 at 5:56 PM

    I keep getting this feeling that Mourinho’s coming very soon.

  • 46 Tsunki // Feb 15, 2016 at 5:56 PM

    Jeff how did you get back in? You paid the bin lads off? 🙂

  • 47 GeordieTwo // Feb 15, 2016 at 5:57 PM

    I would love to see Doumbia have some great matches for us. If we can get him the ball in decent positions he can do the business. If he can get 6 or 7 in the last 12 I think they’ll sign him on a 3 year deal and let Cisse go.

  • 48 Tsunki // Feb 15, 2016 at 5:58 PM

    Wandering – did he forget his scarf last time he was here?

  • 49 GeordieTwo // Feb 15, 2016 at 5:58 PM

    Yes, Mourinho will be coming to St. James in charge of ManU Wandering mate.

  • 50 Blackley and Brownlie // Feb 15, 2016 at 5:58 PM

    Item number 1 on the agenda. Lee, what do the articles of association say about what constitutes a quorum?

  • 51 Tsunki // Feb 15, 2016 at 5:59 PM

    I get the feeling Cisse will come back into the team and score a few. Embarrassingly he has the potential to save old wispy heeds bacon.

  • 52 GeordieTwo // Feb 15, 2016 at 6:00 PM

    I can just imagine Jose in charge at the club.
    “All right then. I’ll start by having a brief chat with the players. Where are they? Oh, I see. You lot are the players. Ahhhh… This is going to be more difficult than I first thought…..”

  • 53 Belfast // Feb 15, 2016 at 6:01 PM

    Aye the bald Mourinho impersonator with a cap on. Russell Slade.

  • 54 jesperfuglsang - capt'n awesome of the lemon crew // Feb 15, 2016 at 6:02 PM

    So Charnley has to account for 40 hours of work each week! How the h€ll does he do that 🙂

  • 55 toon kk // Feb 15, 2016 at 6:03 PM

    If Cisse can stay on side he might poach a couple.

  • 56 Tsunki // Feb 15, 2016 at 6:03 PM

    Relax Jesper, he has a man do that for him. He’s got it covered.

  • 57 GeordieTwo // Feb 15, 2016 at 6:03 PM

    The squad we have is far better than the record indicates. That points the finger straight at Steve. A good manager would have us with about 30 points by now. Even Parsnip would have had 27. Carver, probably not so much. With Carver we would be fighting it out with Villa for 20th. So there’s that to be thankful for at least.

  • 58 Tsunki // Feb 15, 2016 at 6:05 PM

    Thing is if we had real speed on the wings Cisse wouldn’t be offside anywhere near as much. Our failure to drag defenders to the byline or get the opposing team to retreat in panic is half his problem. The other half is his desperation to get on the score sheet.

    Maybe Townsend will signal a turn towards that tactic. Who knows?

  • 59 jesperfuglsang - capt'n awesome of the lemon crew // Feb 15, 2016 at 6:06 PM

    I heard a story today about a guy in Spain who hadn’t shown up for work in 5 or 6 years. The only reason they found out was because he had an work anniversary an known one knew him. Seeing as he wasn’t there it would make sense 😀

    Has anyone actually seen Charnley in his office?

  • 60 croftus5678 // Feb 15, 2016 at 6:06 PM

    @51 tsunki

    tbh buddy we need a striker who can move alongside mit not behind him !

    doumbia can do the job also but macca is far too pig headed to play 2 up front 🙁

    mit / doum /townsend and janmaat and we would score plenty imo with shelvey assisting.

  • 61 Tsunki // Feb 15, 2016 at 6:07 PM

    it’s bad enough that the goal difference is a pair of ducks. it’s when it’s two fat ladies and we are a point below Norwich it’ll be a bit daunting.

  • 62 jesperfuglsang - capt'n awesome of the lemon crew // Feb 15, 2016 at 6:07 PM

    *no one knew him

  • 63 jesperfuglsang - capt'n awesome of the lemon crew // Feb 15, 2016 at 6:08 PM

    What about three up front or is this not debatable?

  • 64 Tsunki // Feb 15, 2016 at 6:09 PM

    Croftus I don’t think mitrovic is the answer. His attitude without the ball is dire. Not a proper strikers desire I’m afraid. With the crosses Townsend puts in we should get back to headers of the ball and poachers.

  • 65 Jib // Feb 15, 2016 at 6:09 PM

    Lest we forget the utterings of the Viking Mystic Meg

    jesperfuglsang – capt’n awesome of the lemon crew // Sep 2, 2015 at 6:04 AM

    Lets see in January whether it is a good or (as I suspect) not buy anything window!

  • 66 jesperfuglsang - capt'n awesome of the lemon crew // Feb 15, 2016 at 6:10 PM

    So Tsunki…you want us to deploy a roadrunner on the wings?

  • 67 Tsunki // Feb 15, 2016 at 6:10 PM

    Jesper are we still talking about football or what Charnley does on his time off?

  • 68 GeordieTwo // Feb 15, 2016 at 6:11 PM

    What’s that you say jesper mate? Three up front? Three? We barely have 3 attackers and you want to use them all at the same time? That would make the attacking end of the pitch very crowded. No, we can’t have that. We like a nice quiet, empty attacking zone for our lone striker to run into……

  • 69 jesperfuglsang - capt'n awesome of the lemon crew // Feb 15, 2016 at 6:11 PM

    The Viking Mistic Meg? Cheap cider again Jeff?

  • 70 jesperfuglsang - capt'n awesome of the lemon crew // Feb 15, 2016 at 6:13 PM

    Tsunki…speaking of time off…when does he work you say? 🙂

  • 71 jesperfuglsang - capt'n awesome of the lemon crew // Feb 15, 2016 at 6:13 PM

    Can’t we discuss both?

  • 72 GeordieTwo // Feb 15, 2016 at 6:15 PM

    Apparently the important training we are focusing on while away is water skiing, and clubbing. After that it’s hangover management, and plenty of Chicharron. Pork scratchings…..Mmmmmm.

  • 73 jesperfuglsang - capt'n awesome of the lemon crew // Feb 15, 2016 at 6:16 PM

    GT…I am just throwing idea out there 🙂

  • 74 GeordieTwo // Feb 15, 2016 at 6:17 PM

    Poor Aarons. What did he do to deserve that? Was the plan to embarrass him because he’s asking for too big a wage? Any manager could see that Hiddink was drooling at the thought of getting at him..

  • 75 jesperfuglsang - capt'n awesome of the lemon crew // Feb 15, 2016 at 6:20 PM

    GT…are you expecting McC to make changes when he has decided on a tactic and formation? It’s hard work coming up with the exact same lineup as the week prior 😉

  • 76 jesperfuglsang - capt'n awesome of the lemon crew // Feb 15, 2016 at 6:21 PM

    What kind of cheap cider do you guys reckon Jeff drinks?

  • 77 jesperfuglsang - capt'n awesome of the lemon crew // Feb 15, 2016 at 6:22 PM

    I imagine he drinks white cider 😉

  • 78 GeordieTwo // Feb 15, 2016 at 6:27 PM

    Well, the back three worked to perfection when we were 4-0 down jesper mate. That’s what I call managing on the fly! I was surprised we could come up with 3 players to defend by that point. Usually we only like to have one or two fit, not suspended players at our disposal…..

  • 79 Jib // Feb 15, 2016 at 6:28 PM

    Belfast I’ve been to Spain to open the property up for the Spring.
    Also made a fuss of the missus for St. Valentine’s.

    As I was there for only a week I never bothered getting the Internet reconnected.

    I never thought the Chelsea game was a target for points but I thought we’d make a better showing.

  • 80 jordijohnty // Feb 15, 2016 at 6:29 PM

    Am i missing something? Just got in this evening and cannot find anything on the BBC website about MacTufty being sacked or resigning. I drove home with lots of optimism

  • 81 GeordieTwo // Feb 15, 2016 at 6:29 PM

    Off to earn my keep now lads….. Please keep coming up with new tactics for us to use. Certainly Steve hasn’t done any of that. But then again he’s only the head coach…….

  • 82 Tsunki // Feb 15, 2016 at 6:31 PM

    But it’s nice to see you back and hitting the ground roadrunnering jeff.

  • 83 Tsunki // Feb 15, 2016 at 6:33 PM

    Jesper I think it’s more likely Absinthe.

  • 84 Jib // Feb 15, 2016 at 6:33 PM

    I missed the mackem kiddy fiddler news as well.
    Will he get time ?

  • 85 Tsunki // Feb 15, 2016 at 6:34 PM

    Jordijonty yeah mate you turned the radio on too soon, try it again in 2017.

  • 86 Tsunki // Feb 15, 2016 at 6:35 PM

    Johnson? Oh I should think so. Probably for his own protection.

  • 87 Tsunki // Feb 15, 2016 at 6:36 PM

    Well gotta go, toner cartridges to buy, pencils to sharpen and all that…

  • 88 jesperfuglsang - capt'n awesome of the lemon crew // Feb 15, 2016 at 6:38 PM

    Tsunki…Absinthe you say…I don’t think Jeff can hold absinthe 😉

  • 89 Jail for Ashley // Feb 15, 2016 at 6:50 PM

    Fcuks sake, Mclaren’s still here and Jib’s back 🙁

  • 90 carl // Feb 15, 2016 at 7:01 PM

    jail For Ashley.
    But your aptly named the Hapless Tuff isn’t.

  • 91 Jail for Ashley // Feb 15, 2016 at 7:06 PM

    carl etc,
    Eh ?

  • 92 jesperfuglsang - capt'n awesome of the lemon crew // Feb 15, 2016 at 7:07 PM

    Jeff…are you that guy from Spain I talk about? 😉

  • 93 jesperfuglsang - capt'n awesome of the lemon crew // Feb 15, 2016 at 7:09 PM

    You know the one who didn’t go to work for 6 years? 😉

  • 94 Fostino // Feb 15, 2016 at 7:18 PM

    Pl tougher now then when mcclaren was at boro. Pl a tougher league then the Dutch league too. Mclaren got found out as England boss and more recently as derby boss. harsh reality is we have a poor manager. Must be the worst record ever for a nufc manager. I worry about his leadership qualities. A good leader would not allow such inconsistent performances. That after all is the major problem with this team. On the plus side..I think we dodged a bullet with garde.

  • 95 sing in the corner // Feb 15, 2016 at 7:48 PM

    I don’t claim to be a professor of psychology or a psychiatrist.
    But… 🙂
    (We have Mr Black to supposedly take care of all that.)
    I often wonder why football performances / tactics tend to hinge on wether you are playing at home or away.
    What the hell is the difference, really?
    Why is it so hard to go to another club’s ground, put your 11 blokes up against their 11 blokes and do what you want to do,what you would do ‘at home’? A crowd shouting nasty names at you? Ok,what else?
    Nowt. It’s a social construct. There is a ref, rules to make sure the game is the same for both teams. Too simplistic? Maybe..
    Get your fingers out, get the hell out there, get on top and stay there. None of this fannying about. There is no good reason why we can’t score a goal away from home but stacks more at our place.
    Now that’s a proper bit of psychology for you!

  • 96 Essex Geordie Bill // Feb 15, 2016 at 7:54 PM

    The only slight glimmer of hope I see is that BigMac is trying to emulate his managerial mentor.

    In the unlikely event of that happening I think we could all forgive him??

  • 97 Essex Geordie Bill // Feb 15, 2016 at 7:56 PM

    I did mention Mr Motivator earlier today, but I don’t think many picked up on my allusion.

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